My minds a blank


Hi, I've just turned 25 and discovered I am pregnant. It was totally unplanned as I fell pregnant on the pill. When I found out I was pregnant I cried my eyes out because of the shock - but now I'm feeling nothing!!! I'm usually a very strong willed person who knows their mind but when it comes to this I've drawn a blank! I've been with my partner for 7 years and we've lived together for 2. My other half has said he will support me with whatever decision I make, but he thinks the timing is wrong and feels we have more things to do with our lives. I haven't really got anyone to talk to about this as I'm distant from my parents and all my friends are either pregnant or just given birth...

How do you know what to do, when your feeling anything???!!!


Me 2

im the same, all I cn think is the doom and gloom, but I know when it would come I would love it.... I really wish it would just go away! I dont want a guilt trip for the rest of my life either! Thing is my boyf would love it and be a fab wee daddy, I dont want to lose him over this! I think its diff for you's in England too... I have to fly over frm Ireland and even though I could do medical i have to do surgical else I'd have to stay over so it seems such a big scary deal. I really don't know what to do. My life is nearly where I want it now.


Did you check these out?


Hun, Did you check out the websites I and beherenow have listed on this post? They may be able to help you.
Take care and let me know how u r doing. Xx


Same here

hi hun, ive just posted. im kind of in same boat but i have 2 already. in my opinion youre young, its your 1st, just keep it! i cant keep mine, i really cant c how and its crap. i dont get much family help but 1 will be grand and tax credits will pay towards nursery.


How are you?

Hi hun,
Just wondered how you are doing and what you decided. If you need to chat, pm me, maybe I can help.


Have you decided

Hi im 35 with two childen and married. I had an abortion on 24th jan as i was worried about my back coping withanother pregnancy and also hubby i 44 and i knew he didnt want to go there again as we have a 2 year old girl together and i have a 12 yr old boy. I was emotional wreck with this decision and i did what i thought everyone wanted including my mother as she told me she had abortion when i was about ten and made it seem easy.
I somehow had that abortion, i was 8wks so they said. They also said it was "just a blob" which i was quick to jump down their throat and correct them as i have had 2 kids and a misscariage and i knew that this tiny little thing had a tiny little face and most of its organs formed. That night it hit me what i done and i would do anything to turn back the clock and ignore everybody and do the only thing that i could live with and keep my baby and just deal with the issues. My advice would be slow down, do not rush, read alot and go to get a ultrasound done(not a abortion clinic)so you know how far u are and without them making this huge decision seem like your getting a tooth pulled and talk to gp or nurse or counselor.If you unsure wether you can live with ending your childs life. Then you propably cant. Somepeople can seem to get over it and some cant. I have never heard any mother say "i wish i never had my baby" But since i had this abortion ive read alot of letters of deep regret from having abortion. I hope this doesnt come to late and upset you. Goodluck and be strong. Kelly


Abortion support

My name is Ruth and I offer both pre and post abortion support for women who are suffering mentally regarding this issue.

I suffer with post abortion syndrome myself having had an abortion last year and set up a support group online to help me deal with this and in turn I currently help many women with the mental affects abortion has.
I run a 10 step program post abortion.
If you would like to contact me for any support and advice then please do so on


Ruth x



Hey hun. I too fell pregnant on the pill and was shocked. I cried then felt numb for a few days, not really feeling much. After about a week it actually sunk in! I have the first pill tomorrow for a medical abortion and I'm so nervous. Go to your gp and discuss your options it made me feel loads better! It's so hard to think straight in a situation like this. Try your best to talk to your partner about what option is best for you both emotionally, financially etc, it helps to speak about it I think. Feel free to message me if you need to chat to anyone. All the best xx


Minds a blank....


Hi, thanks for your reply. I've read quite a few threads where members have been very much against abortion, which is fine as everyone is entitled to their opinions but unfortunately I've got to consider this option because I don't think I'm ready to become a parent for many reasons such as emotionally or financially which is my head working things out logically. I think I'm alittle lost cause I thought I'd have some sort of feeling which would back this up, but I haven't . A few have written follow your heart, but I'm not feeling anything at all! When I found out I was pregnant I went into auto pilot for dealing with situations and I went to the family planning clinic - they've given me a two week window to make a decision and I've been booked in for an abortion on 8th. I'm only 5 weeks, so I will be having the same as you if I go through with it - which I am
nervous about too. I hope it works out okay for you tomorrow *hugs* Kx


Heart and mind


Hello klou1987, sorry to hear what you're going thru. I can understand that you are in shock and both your heart and mind are on auto-pilot right now. Since you have posted here, it's obvious that you have some doubts, practical and/or emotional ones, about what you should do. What are some of the practical reasons that keeping your baby might be a good decision? Certainly if you think about the science of it, reason and logic tell us that the child is already human, with a unique genetic code, gender, hair and eye color, and according to most research, even some aspects of his or her personality are already determined. The following video shows the development in a most interesting way:


There are some good comments below the video too, but unfortunately just a small bit of nastiness.

Anyway in addition to reasoning it out, It would also be better not to ignore what your feelings are. As you said you are on autopilot but sooner or later you will have to deal with the emotions, whatever decision you make. It's far better to explore that now, while you still have not made an irreversible decision it may be helpful to get some counselling from specialists in unexpected pregnancy cases. Try http://www.careconfidential.com/ - they can give you some insights and if you provide your location, can set you up with pregnancy counselling specialists located close to you. Or in the US or Canada go to http://optionline.org/ - other places besides UK and US, use http://www.heartbeatservices.org/connections/worldwide-directory .

So take your time, talk to others, and make sure to know what is really in your heart and your mind. And I wish you the best no matter what you decide. Peace!


Take care


I wasnt on the pill, but became pregnant. I was 22, at uni, no job, no prospects, and I didnt even know how to care for a baby! My bf was not supportive, except to say hed pay for an abortion. I was scared, but decided to have my baby and, when I saw his precious little face, I knew I made the right decision. Yes, there were some hard times, but I learned to take care of him, got a good job, went on in my courses. And hes now a grown man, who went to uni and has an excellent job as well. Now he looks out for me, as I took care of him.
Talk to your partner and, maybe if you have a doctor you trust, talk with him as well before making your decision. Also, here are some websites you can go to for help:
http://www.careconfidential.com/ (UK)
http://optionline.org/ (UK, US, Canada)
http://www.heartbeatservices.org/connections/worldwide-directory (worldwide)

They will go over everything with you and help you to decide rationally what would be best for you, your baby and your partner. But, if you want to talk you can pm me.
Take care Kathy xx




Those threads are from people who havent worn our shoes. Try not to let that get you down. deciding is the hardest thing in the world and theres so many emotions! You're probably just in shock like I was but eventually you'll come to terms with it. I wasn't going to tell anyone else but I confided in my best friend who saw it from an outside view and that helped too. Whatever you decide you'll have support! Try your best to keep calm, my post has lots of great responses on that made me see things clearer. And thankyou me too! Take care xx


My minds a blank...

**When your not feeling anything.....**

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