Please help me...i've been with my man for 3 yrs who i truely love with all my heart and things couldnt be better, but i went out and got really drunk and had a great night and the next thing i'm in another mans arms and i'm feeling so bad, i've never cheated in my life and hated anyone that ever used drink as an excuse and now its happened to me. The hardest thing is that this man is a friend of his...what do i do? i really dont wanna loose my man but it makes me feel sick thinking i've done this to him..

i think you have cheated...but don't be overwhelmed with guilt...
you can either talk about it with your man....
give him your reason...and just be prepared for the next scenario....
you should know your man better than anyone else her..
so be prepared for his reaction....
and avoid the guy whom you slept with....

sorry but theres no way you love him, if you loved him you wouldnt cheat simple as! and dont bother using the fact you were drunk as an excuse, if you cant controle yourself with drink inside you then heres an idea.....DONT DRINK!

How can u say u love this man??? Do u have kids with this man?
Makes it worse bcoz u did it with his friend!!! You should tell him, just imagen if he finds out???

This is a hard one because if you turned it around and he done it to you, how would you feel? Would you dump him?

Thing is it's a risky one not telling him because your at risk with somebody else telling him. What would be worse, him finding out by somebody else, or you telling him? Personally, if you feel that bad about it, i would tell him. He's probably more likely to forgive you in the end if you tell him, even if it might take him a long time to trust you again, but could you live without him? If somebody else did tell him then he's guna find you not only a cheat but a liar aswell, and personally i couldnt live with that.

If you think he would never find out then maybe it's worth keeping it to yourself.

Ive never been in that situation so i cant say i know how you feel. But things happen sometimes and you cant undo them. Was it really the drink that made you do it? Maybe its a sign that you need to cut down drinking?? Im not judging you im just trying to understand.

Let me know what you decide to do, good luck

XXX

Thank you for ur views jodie, ur totally right about if it was on the other hand,cause if it was him id be devastated and want to shoot his kneecaps...lol, but i honestly didnt think i'd ever do this and yes it was 100% the drink! i dont go out much cause of the kids and i can honestly its been yrs since i've been that drunk, i cant even remember that much about it, but i know everyone will say it's no excuse cause thats what id say...i am slightly worried about him finding out as its a friend but if he was 2 find out,that brings a whole other bit of trouble,so maybe he wont say anything, but that would happen even if i told him...i no in my heart he will end it with me and he really doesnt deserve it,but i cant help being slightly selfish cause i want him so bad...this is the man i wanna marry and i need to anything to save that...

Thanks for speaking openly about it tho, thats why its best to speak to strangers about problems i find, cause they tell u the truth!!!

Hows ur dilema coming along?

Thanks katie...xxxx

I once kissed some guy when I was drunk and I never told my boyfriend about it.

I don't think it is selfish, because it took me a long time to get over my bad conscious...

As I see it you deserve to feel bad about it. Telling your man may rid you of your bad consciousness, but it will tear your boyfriend apart and destroy everything.
You are right he doesn't deserve that.

Pray that his friend will keep his mouth shut and move on.

Oh, and by the way - if you can't control your actions when you are drinking you should seriously think about cutting down on the alcohol. It's the only right thing to do if you risk ending up in these situations.

Thanks for ur comment...i totaly agree with the drinking situation and about him being torn apart! i feel i have to keep it 2 myself because it will break us up..its been about 3 months now and i've managed to sort of put it to the back of my mind..and we are very very happy together...we have 3 children and planning no4..and i have no doubt that i will marry this marry man 1 day...he is my true love and yes i should feel bad and i do! i just hope it stays this way.. and i no this might sound bad, but i always new i loved him, but this really has made me see just how much!

thanks again for being honest!

katie.xx

Don't look back in life. Look forward in life. If you are so submerged in shame, go to a church and ask for forgiveness. Small affairs don't mean anything.

you say you want to marry this man! can you marry him without having to tell him the truth?