I just would like to know from anyone how to deal with a man that you caould have a completely wonderful relationship with if it wasnt for the Jealousy...I'm not talking about him just not liking me talking to other men (because God forbid) I'm talking about a man not believing that I AM on a bus coming home when he calls me on the mob just after 5 to find out where I am. Then tells me he's leaving because he really thinks that I was in someones car. This is a man that wants to know who I am dressing up for at work if i WEAR SOMETHING A LITTLE DIFFERENT OR MY HAIR A DIFFERENT WAY.
The biggest problem with this person is that he also has a prety bad case of adhd. He also, when none of this is going on, has a really wonderful heart. He truly loves me. I just think he's not too sure how to cope with the emotion of it all.

this is so tricky - where is the line between the ADHD behavior and just plain scary obsessive! you need to make it very clear to him that it is not acceptable to accuse you in this way and that any more of it and youre outta there!! this sort of thing can get way out of hand and just because he is basically a nice person dont for one moment things wont get ugly - they will!!he would really benefit from a few sessions with a relationship counsellor who can spell out "the rules" for nice behavior in a relationship...i know it sounds a little odd but if he has "rules" he can learn to check in with himself to see if he is sticking to them...and for people with such disorders it is so much easier to know what to do than to have to try to work it out when they are under stress - a relaxation routine is so important too - whether its yoga or meditation or stretching or very loud music - whatever works for him!!! thought stopping really helps too - really saying to himself when he starts thinking this way STOP!!! and again as often as needed... please be very clear to him and to yourself that this is not ok and any more of - go - he must understand that - is he on any medication? that can help - there are a number of choices so if one doesnt help - there are others - sometimes a dose needs changing - if you lose or gain weight for instance - i know there is a stigma about medication for this sort of thing but it can make such a difference..good luck to you...big squeeze xx

Hi Glynda, I'd just like to say thank you very much & I will keep in mind all you have said. I think some counciling will help a great deal too.
Thank you for your time again. x

i really hope it goes well for you both good luck xx