hi i'm normally popin on n off on this site i'm in a relationship with my boyfriend and we have had our ups and downs hes cheated n ive been baby mad since i had a miscarrige after my dad funeral i know work as an escort in london and sleep wit different men all the time and ive recently bumped into a few old male friends of myn one called tom and hes gr8 hes such a ladys man and he has 2 kids wih 2 different girl but i cant stop thinkin bout him and the fact hes got 2 kids wit sum1 else so why cant he just get me up the duff?? i'm in my last nerve wih my partner hes become lazi bone idle and fat gud 4 nufin n i hate him now i reali do god i needed to let that out...


please some adice would be gratefull.xxxx




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I'm really sorry to hear that you had a miscarriage. I had a miscarriage at 18 and it broke my heart at the time. I was in a relationship that had the potential to become violent and I broke it off soon after. Anyway, I missed my 'baby' sooo much that for the first year I desperately wanted to get pregnant again and I didn't care who it was too, I just wanted a baby. I even considered going on a night out and just picking anyone up in the hopes he's get me pregnant. I didn't care that I would never see the man again or that my baby would never know it's dad - I just needed to be pregnant so badly.

However, despite all these things running through my mind I did none of them at all. I forced myself not to have another relationship at all until I got over the grief of losing the baby, because I knew deep down that I could not bring a child into the world under such circumstances - that the baby deserved a happy, healthy mother and a loving father and should be born at a time when I was in a stable, loving relationship with a stable work and personal life in order to give any children the best possible start.

It has now been 4 years since I miscarried in 2003, and I have been in my first relationship since then for 18 months. We are finally considering having our first child within the next 2 years and I am so, so glad I waited until this point, because the pain of miscarrying does eventually lessen, and I know now that having a child to that man would have been disastrous anyway.

Sorry to have gone on a bit, I just want you to understand that your pain will lessen and that you will be happy one day and that you have many many years left to have children. Use these years to find a man who you do love and respect and who feels the same way about you. Use this time to heal from the pain of miscarriage - I know how hard this is and it doesn't help that there's little to no support available for this. Put your future children first - what do they deserve? They deserve to know who their father is, to be brought up by 2 parents who love each other, and to have a stable and secure upbringing. It doesn't sound like you are anywhere approaching able to provide that at the moment.

darls you must know that your lifestyle is not one for bringing a baby into....babies are a huge amount of work and a commitment like no other...and as they grow they need a parent(or 2) to guide them and show them - by example- how to live-and you know the way you are living is not a good example...babies are cute little things-but they grow and they are demanding,sometimes unreasonable little people and you cant just expect them to bring themselves up while you run around town with a whole bunch of blokes- im not judging you for living this way-just understand that if you want kids-you would need to really change your life....spend some time with babies and kids and get to know what they are really like-its not all cute and gurgly!!