Hi,

I'm been raped few years ago when I was a teen, I am now 20. I have a current partner and since a few weeks we've been having sex. But the thing is this is kinda uncomfortable. I know I tense up during it so I assumed that is because of that and the reason for this is maybe my rape ?

What could I do to enjoy sex and not tense up ?
Thanks !

i was raped when i was fourteen years old by my step dad while he was drunk. he's really big and strong and easily over powered me. after it happened i couldn't even stand a guy looking at me. i tried to look past it, but ever guy i dated in some way reminded me of the rape. even something a simple as a touch on the leg would send chills up my spine. my current boyfriend is about 5'7 and about 130 pounds, we were friends first and we never drank near each other. i told him i was raped and that i was afrain to have sex. he told me he was a virgin and that he wasn't looking to rush into it either. aooo my advice to you is first find someone you're confortable with. whether its friends first or someone that in no way could remind you of the person who hurt you. i'm in love with my boyfriend now, something i never thought could happen. i know its hard to get over something like a rape, but try to learn from it. this experience made you a stronger woman and you must learn to not let it affect you're every day life.

i was raped nearly 2 years ago when i just turned 16. was drugged, woke up on a field with a "friend" on top of me, i said no god knows how many times and he said "its ok its ok". i didnt have a clue what was happening as i was out of it.

im now with my boyfriend and have been for nearly a year. i was a bit weary of having sex with him at first but as we gained respect for each other and begin to trust him its much more relaxed. you dont even have to have sex all the time, just try foreplaying more. If u feel uncomfortabe, watch a film, cosy in bed and turn the light out. just feeling safe lying next to him watching something simple as a comedy/romantic film, i think, makes a diffrence. thats my opinion tho.

Even a few drinks to relax, dont get drunk tho.

xx

I was raped by a supposed friend

i was 18 and im also 20.

ever since then i have been very shy about sex and and other things like help satisfie my partner

to the extent i cannot perform. i have no ideas what to do either so i am interested in any replys

Im sorry to turn the tables to me, but I can tell you how I handled it. I was raped. basically I told him I wanted to and then changed my mind and he said too late... From there on it was hard. I could not have sex with out something reminding me of the rape. Be it a position or a touch..
I talked to my partner about it and he helped me move through it. He would always move slowly, looking at me for approval before he did much of anything. Lots of foreplay, that helped me relax. Slowly we got around to intercourse.
It takes alot of trust before you can have comfortable sex again. But once your comfortable and trusting him, you will be able to relax....