Im so confused, do i try or not? : Discussion Board soFeminine - 10 January

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   Pregnancy > Discussion Board Miscarriage

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"Im so confused, do i try or not?"
Posted by miric25 13 July  at  03:06

Hiya All, I recently had 2 miscarriages close together & the 2nd m/c was very hard on me emotionally (very poor hospital care) and I vowed I wouldnt start trying again until after christmas, now I have had 3 periods (I would say normal but the 1st one after m/c was definatly NOT normal) and weve just had a new addition to the family, my niece Brooke & I absolutely ADORE her, she is amazing & I love going to visit her BUT its raising ideas in my head about trying again & I just cant make sense of my feelings.I was really trepid about my niece being born & scared of my own emotions but after seeing her ive fell head over heels & made me accept my m/c a little more, its been upsetting but mostly its just left me feeling 'weird' Im desperate to try again but I simply cant face the prospect of another 'possible' miscarriage. My husband is behind my descion 110% no matter what, hes left the ultimate decsion to me but I just dont know how to feel, im so torn & conflicted. I know you people cant say 'YES' or 'NO' because its up to me & nobody else in the end but I really could do with ANY advice you could offer, maybe some of you have been in this situation before & realise what im feeling? Any advice is appreciatedHellen
 
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"Sorry im no help.."
Posted by saucysassy 13 July  at  18:52

I think i agree with the other comment, only you can decide. I know myself i lost 2 babies im pregnant now and had a scare a few weeks ago and i said then if i lost this baby as well, i just couldnt face trying again because i cant cope with the stress for 12 long weeks hoping everything will go ok and going into complete panic when something goes wrong. My OH too was really supportive and said ok we'd look into adopting. Like you my sis in law has had a baby not long ago, so ours wouldnt have been far apart, and also has an older daughter who wouldve been pretty much the same age as our first child. Its hard and im all for adopting but i really think if something happens i would try again, just because i so want to know what a combination of us would be like and i know deep down my OH wants his own baby. I also think if it will happen it will happen, and hopefully tests etc would find out why i couldnt carry my baby and sort the problem. Whatever you decide good luck, i say think positively but i know myself that is so not easy!
"Hi hun!"
Posted by nicke15 13 July  at  12:33

I really think only you an make the decision as to whether you are ready to try again.

I have had three miscariages in the last year. The first a complete,the second a missed which required a d&c and the third a chemical pregnancy. It hurt alot each time but I am a fatalist really and believe that if it is meant to be it will be.It doesn;t mean that I am not scared as I am dreading what another pregnancy can mean....I am also having tests at the hospital now to see if there is a reason behind it.

My sister also had a little girl in May. If I had not lost the second it would have been due just after her's. I felt really gutted when she was born but I love her to bits and it just made me more determined to achieve my goal.

Hope this helps.

Nicki x




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