i had an early scan 2day-i'm 6+ weeks, and they couldn't see anything. the choices are, its too early to see anything(at 6 weeks surely they would see something), i've had an early m/c or it could be ectopic(this would make it my 3rd ectopic). i had bloods taken and i go back on wed for more so they'll know more then.

i cant explain how i'm feeling just now. i want to curl in a ball and cry, i want to get totally rat arsed, i want to take a long walk into the sea but i know i wont do any of these.

part of me wants to just give up, the heartache is horrific losing a child(i know i dont have to tell any of u that), then part of me thinks why the h*ll should i give up my dream of another child. my mum reckons that its Gods way of saying not to have any more coz i'm blessed with one of each and theres no other kind. i know she means well but that doesn't help.

anyway, i'll stop rabbiting for now. i'll post again when i find out more. thanks for reading

tc, gail xx

""

Oh Gail,

I haven't been on for a while so just catching up on posts, I can't believe it I'm so sorry. Sending lots of love to you and mike. Pm me any time

tc Ashley x

got the results of the blood taken yesterday 2day at 2pm. the hcg levels have went from 427 to 224. the docs happy that its not ectopic but i've miscarried. thats me got 2 ectopics and a m/c under my belt. i'm starting to question what i've done to deserve this. i think i need to take some time out before ttc again

thanks for the replies and support ladies, and lauren i hope ur results are better than mine

tc, gail xx

so sorry hun was really hoping things wouldn't turn out like this for you. Know exactly what you mean about wondering what you've done to deserve this, I went through just the same feelings and was totally convinced I must be a truly terrible person and didn't deserve to be a mum. It took me a few months after my 3rd m/c to feel ready to try again and to be honest I think I did the right thing waiting, it's different for everyone but I just couldn't deal with all the worry straight away. You'll know yourself when the time is right and it's so worth the wait when things turn out well, I'm 24 weeks pregnant again now but it took me 4 attempts and more heartache than I ever could've imagined to get here. Don't give up hope hun just give yourself time and things will work out, know it doesn't feel like it now but you will get there. For now the only advice I can give you is don't bottle it up, I didn't really talk after my 1st or 2nd m/c and then it all came flooding out when I lost the 3rd and it was only then that I realised how hard it had all hit me. There's no way round it, it's devastating and it doesn't just go away if you try to bury your feelings so don't be afraid to talk, even if it's only on here. I'm living proof that miracles do happen but I haven't forgotten how it feels to be where you are now and I never will I just hope my story gives you a little hope for the future. Take care of yourself, will be thinking of you.

Love,
Clare xxx

Hi
I had some spotting and brown discharge from Monday, it has stopped today, but I did go to the hospital for a scan. Like you they said I was too early to tell, but I knew I must have been at least 6 weeks. I had blood test done on tuesday and again today, i have got to ring later for the results!!!
Just wondering how you got on with yours?
I have had 2 perfect pregnancies and births, so am a really worried as to what is wrong!

lauren xxxx

hi gail
omg im sorry to hear it again,i remember you as you lost one when i did,the worlds so unfair.but i can understand what your mums sayng but theres only you wo nos how bad enough you want it.i hope my fingers are crossed that all is well hun,if theres any god then he will bless you with this child good luck
tc linzi xxx

I sincerly hope it's just too early - we've both spent far too much time on the m/c board and I was so pleased when you got your BFP

I will be keeping everything crossed for you

Take care

Lisa x

hi gail,

i really hope you have good news i really do. i had a scan last wednesday at 12weeks and there was no heart beat i have 2 girls so i knew the minute she put the ultrasound thing on my tummy that there was going to be bad news but having children already i think makes it harder because you know you can carry a healthy baby and you know what your missing. this was my 1st miscarriage (hopefully my last!) and it was the biggest shock and devestation ive ever experienced. i hope it all ends well for you. i will keep an eye on this board to see how you get on.

all my luck and best wishes,

orla x x x