"Abortion help "

I had an abortion about a month ago i was about 6 weeks into my pregnancy and i feel that it is the biggest regret of my life, the reason for my abortion is my boyfriends parents were completely against me having a child,, i love kids and when i found out i was pregnant i was extremely happy, i couldnt wait to see my child and hold my own baby in my hands i already started lookin for baby names but i was kind of forced into having an abortion especially by my bf's mom, every night since the abortion i've felt sad, crying all night and long not sleeping, i feel that i took an innocent babys life i cant believe i layed there and let the doctors take MY baby out of mee,, ive always been against abortions ever since i knew what an abortion was,, i dont know how i stayed at that clinic and went along with everything.. i wish i could go backk to that day and never go through with it,, i wont be able to hold my baby anymore cuz there is no baby to hold. i dont know what to doo is there anyone out there with the same problem as me?.. i have no one to talk to and i want my baby backk :'(

you poor thing, i know exactly how you feel. I had an abortion about 2 years ago - I also felt that I wasnt ready to make a desicion of my own and the whole ordeal was horrific, You need to find somebody you can talk to about all this, its truely the most heartbreaking experience - but believe me this feeling will pass. You are never going to feel the same again, you have to take your time to come to terms with your loss, you are grieving - let yourself feel however you want to feel then let it rest.

You are only going to feel any better when you have given yourself time to heal. X Have you thought about maybe having some kind of gesture? It might be helpfull to you with closure. I know that when I lost my baby It took me untill very very recently to feel human again. I got a balloon and went out and let it go - just a gesture i know but it really helpt me x

If you want to talk let me know xxxx

i had an abortion in june'07. It was the hardest decision I had to make in my life. I have no one to talk to: no friends or family i can talk to. I just feel so alone. I have a bf and he was the dad of the unborn. He dosent like to talk, maybe thats his way of dealing with it! I feel like after 9mths now I should be over things but im not! I cry myself to sleep every night, Im reminded of it just by simple things like awww look at tht baby that could of been me or i see pictures of young famous couples with their new babies that came when my baby would have been due and it really really upsets me. Im constantly reminded of it everywhere I go. At the moment Im at the point where I just see life as being pointless, I find it a chore to get up n do my hair and makeup. I dont even go out with my friends, im to ashamed. It will be my 21st soon and I have nothing planned. I feel like i deserve nothing, which is the truth. I should know better than to cause myself more heart ache as I lost my mum when I was just 16. I live in a house full of guyz and I feel like I get shut out and have to cope with everything myself. I would like to just pack my bags with the guy I love and get away to start a fresh but that takes money and to get money i have to stay here and suffer it, day in day out with no1 but myself to get me threw! My whole world feels like its just crashing down around me, bit by bit (person by person) and there is nothing I can do to stop it. Maybe this is Gods way of getting me back for the abortion? Who knows.

x

I completely agree with how you feel about abortion; and i understand how you must be feeling. But now its happened you shouldn't feel bad, everyone makes mistakes when theyr under pressure and thats part of life; at least now you can give advice to others in your situation.

i hope you can begin to feel better about yourself, and not always feel guilty

I too had abortion this year at 11 weeks as my boyfriend was not happy with the situation, on the other hand i was excited used to pat my tummy and talk to my baby then he dropped the bombshell, 'he didnt want this baby' im still with him and i love him very much but i look at him sometimes and want to scream that he took my baby away from me, although like u say we layed there and did what we where told you feel like your not in contol and your to scared to change your mind, i changed my appointment to the next week in hope that i could change his mind but it was indeed pointless.
Last week my friend had a little girl and instead of being happy and sharing her joy i was resentfull, and i went home and cryed, because she had what i didnt.
I'm here now because my baby woul be due tomorrow and i needed to say something but who do we talk to we cant because we are to afraid that people will judge us, we need help real help but for now if you ever want to talk i'll be here for you because i know how it feels and i know that ppl think well you did it to yourself but it's not like that.
I know how much you miss that baby. promise.

its such a hard decision to have gone through and and do kind of know what your going through although my abortion was for different reasons its alot to take on. it will get easier and that may not be what you want to hear, you are still young and if your partner does want a child with you then try again but dont let his mum have any say whydidnt he stand up for you? it doesnt help that the nhs rush things through so quickly i swear the day after i said i wanted one i was in scanned and knocked out and with all the hormones it makes the situation worse but things happen for a reason at least now you know how much you want one. good luck and dont think of what youve lost think about what youll one day have.(p.s it may take a while for things to get back no normal it took me months but it will happen just relax) keep us informed
xx

Dear Lostbaby,

I am so sorry for your loss, and can barely imagine the grief you are going through, which is perfectly normal after losing your baby. It is terrible that your bfs parents forced you into it, really shame on them. To cope with your grief, please contact an organisation specialising in helping women like you. It is called Rachels Vineyard

www.rachelsvineyard.org

East Midland
Contact: Karen James 07792 187638
Next retreat: TBA

Essex
Contact: Clare McCullough 020 7723 1740
Next retreat: TBA

London
Contact: Susan Boyle 020 7723 1740
Location: Brentwood Essex


You will be able to go through the stages of grief and resolution and forgiveness in a retreat with this organisation. If you someone to talk to during this difficult time please send me a private message and I can call you back.

Take care of yourself
Siobhan

I i`m so sorry they put you through that, i know how you feel cause 10 yrs ago i had to go through the same thing, my good for nothing boyfriend at the time made me and wouldnt let me tell any one and made me go through it on my own aswell!! i went through it on my own and only a couple of people know bout it now too, my mum doesnt even know, would be so good to talk bout it but no one knows how it feels, i still cry bout it now, you`ll never forget but it does get easier trust me, talk to who you can cause its not nice bottleing it up for years, Talk ok,you know there is light at the end of the tunnel, i now have two beautiful children and they are the best thing thats ever happened, it will happen one day!!!! good luck to you x