I don't want to sound like an old bore, but there is indeed one thing couples ( any age ! ) can do : they don't HAVE to drink or smoke too much ! (And this goes for dads as well ).
Teenage pregnancy makes me shudder, all those children having children, or having repeated abortions, when contraception is so easy to get, nowadays. Drives me mad !

There has been lots of media interst in the British press recently about how women are leaving it longer to have children, preferring to have a career and ensure they're financially and emotionally stable before procreating.

Arguments about teenage mums aside (if you believe everything in the newspapers, it's only teens and women over the age of 35 who are having babies at all!), what does everyone think about this?

Have we got a right to have children when we want, or are we selfish for putting our career/happiness/general enjoyment of life first and having kids later?

On my personal point of view I think that any healthy woman has got the right to adopt or procreate a child if she wants so. The prolem is that she must be very careful to think about the human environment she will be able to offer to the future child. No loneliness. She procreate not for her but for another living person. The forthcominbg child must not find himself or helelf alone and not surrounded by an equilibrated familial society. And also in the case of he<hy disaster (sickness of death) the mother must have done every single administrative action to protect the child. Having a child is beautiful but it requets a lot of generosity and personal equilibrium. It is better to have a "late"' mum than a teenager mum who in fact is another child herself. Excuse my english I am french.

I personally think that if you can criticise teenage mums then you can critisise late mums!

Everybody is arguing over when the right time to have a child is, surely only the mother and father knows when that is!

Leave people to do what they want to do and if you don't agree with it, don't judge them!
Let them live their lives as they want and you live your life as you want.

And complaining about f*****g taxes. If your that bothered don't pay them. Taxes are paid for a lot of things, but if you complain say for keeping immigrants in, then you get called racist. This kind of discrimination is just as bad!

Leave mums to be mums when they want and get on with your own life!

Thnxx for reading

Rachelll x

39 and 33 weeks pregnant with my first - I only met my husband and 30, married at 35 and now pregnant (took time, but once hormones related to PCOS was sorted - which meant I would have had trouble falling pregnant my whole life).

So if I wanted a stable family environment for my child, I had to wait! I hope my marriage is a thoughtfully considered and committed one (only time will tell), but I do know many of my friends who married / children early are divorced and single parents, which is not something I am breathless to experience. As there are no guarantees in life, who knows what lies ahead. But I definately know that "I know more now than I did then", and this relationship has a better chance of long term survival than any of my previous ones (which, by definition, didn't survive!)

were born when their parents were in their late thirties. I think my daughter-in-law can consider herself lucky, as she got pregnant easily, as soon as she wanted to, while it seems to be difficult for some friends of hers. Unfortunately, you can't just "choose " to have a baby in later life, if you are a woman, the older you get, the less fertile you are.
There are indeed lots of advantages for the kids : their parents can afford a large house, a baby-sitter, and all sorts of luxuries younger couples just have to do without. Now, as a grandmother, I feel I have to transmit as much as I can right now, because I am afraid I may not be around when the grandkids are grownups.

pros and cons....it is such a personal decision, and as you said many times you don't have the choice. You bring up a point that people in their 30s can afford more, (a house, etc) so there is that too. I'm glad that I waited until my late 20s to have kids, but at the same time for me personally, I don't think I could handle babies again at my now age of 38! My kids were 13 months apart. Glad I did that, but boy was I tired!

Your comments are really interesting from a grandparent's perspective, ladyanneforever. I agree that waiting until your thirties usually mean that you can afford better for your children. that's what we have decided to do anyway, but we'll have to see whether or not w find it harder to cocneive.
The press are putting pressure on younger women to start families because they say we'll all be infertile because we drink/smoke too much, then saying in the same breath how awful it is that Britain has the highest teenage pregnancy rate in Europe...
Mixed messages or what?!

I don't want to sound like an old bore, but there is indeed one thing couples ( any age ! ) can do : they don't HAVE to drink or smoke too much ! (And this goes for dads as well ).
Teenage pregnancy makes me shudder, all those children having children, or having repeated abortions, when contraception is so easy to get, nowadays. Drives me mad !

I agree wholehearedly ladyanneforever!

There have been so many articles in the press recently about how women are leaving it later and having to resort to expensive fertility treatment etc which costs tha tax payer money. We are being demonised for wanting to live our lives a little first. then if anyone has a baby in their early twenties, suddenly the press moan about how all these young mothers can't cope.
We can't win!

I have mixed feelings about this, I know a few people who have waited until later in life to have kids, (into their 40's), and I think in a lot of ways that it's not fair for the children, because by the time they grow up and become adults, their parents will be senior citizens, and probably will miss out on seeing their grandkids. That is so sad, because everyone wants their mom around when they have kids...on the other hand, who am I to judge, I also know that their babies are dearly loved & appreciated!

Definately a good point about not seeing grandkids etc.

It makes me angry that 35 year olds are classed as 'old' in this debate though! (that seems to be the case in the UK at least)

I agree i am fourty seven i have four children ages 20 11 9 6 , i was thirty six haveing my 11yr old and i was treated as a grandmother ok my sixyr old was a error but the only thing i regret is not haveing enough time to spend with my grandson.

to me, to be considering 35 as too old to have kids! A lot of people here in America have kids well into their 40's...although I felt a little old back when I was having my kids at 28 & 29 years old! I think that having a baby keeping me up all night now would probably kill me! Hee hee! I hope you are doing well...been busy here with the kids getting back to school and getting used to new classrooms, new teachers. How 'bout you?