The case of my fiance's ex
Me and my guy have been engaged for about 3 months now and I have a huge problem with his past relationship. Now the problem is not with them still talking because if that were the case I wouldn't be with him cause I don't play that ex game. Anyway the problem is with their whole past relationship itself. My fiance is 19 years old and he just broke up with his ex about a year ago, the problem is: She just turned 16, now do the math and you'll come up with she was only about 13 when they first started dating about 2 years ago and he was like 17. Well that bothers the holy crap out of me because their relationship was a sexual one. Now I am a strong believer in statutory rape and underage dating laws and I felt what he done was wrong, immoral and quite frankly illegal. Now I know lots of guys date younger girls but that doesn't make it right. This girl was by definition a ho because for one she lied to him and his parents about her age at the time and even when my fiance found out her real age he didn't break it off. Now that should of been a red flag telling him that if she needed to lie about her age than she knew she was too young for him in the first place. But let me tell you a little about my fiance, up until a little while ago he didn't think very highly of himself and he felt girls didn't want to talk to him, he's very attractive, mixed race but he never had a lot of luck with girls so when he met this particular one at the mall I guess he was just so disillusioned with the fact that she wanted to talk to him or whatever. Now this whole thing still bothers me to this day because I can't stand the fact that my fiance's first sex was with a 14 year old girl (they waited about a year to have sex, which further proves that he knew she was too young to pursue a sexual relationhsip with her) but he still did it and that's what bothers me. I can't let it go and the worst part is, it's not even like he was the one who came to his senses and broke it off...no, he wanted to marry the girl even though he deep down knew she was no good and she was the one who wound up breaking his heart and dumping him for another guy after 2 years. But this is not where it ends; when I first met my guy he was still talking to the little whore and letting her make him feel worst about their break up and she was even flaunting her new boyfriend in his face and he was just letting her. Well needless to say I had to put a stop to that real quick if I was going to continue dating him and lucky for me and him he finally came to his senses and erased her from his life. I was happy at first but then all the stuff kept creeping back into my head, I would give anything to make his one only other serious relationship be with someone who had been his own age but I know I can't erase the past but neither can I push it from my thoughts. Now I have a complex and anytime I see an older guy dating someone who's 15 or 16 whether it's in real life or I'm seeing it on Maury or Jerry Springer I get physically sick to my stomach and I have gotten so angry about it to the point where I wanted to start a website alerting people of pedophiles and sexual predators and asking guys why they date younger girls even though they know it's not right. The other thing is that sometimes it causes problems in my relationship with my fiance because I'll think about it and I'll just get mad out of nowhere and take it out on him and more than anything he wants me to just forget about it and he always says how stupid he was for falling for her and that he knew he shouldn't have been with her or had sex with her and even his parents and friends had gotten on him for dating such a young girl. I want to let go of this but no matter how much I try it just always comes up again and I feel the same way all over again. On top of all of it sex is amazing with him but I always wonder if he had sex with her like he's having with me and you can't even begin to understand how horrible that feels esp. when I couldn't see him having that kind of physical relationship with a 15yr. old. I need someone's opinion please I need to get over this before I marry him. Any advice?? Sorry this post is so long but I had to get this out. HELP!!!!!!
| 
