I dont no whats rong with me

me & my hubby have been together 3 years. its never been straight forwards relationship hes a squaddie and always away.
weve lost 4 babies in a row now and were undergoing intencive tests to see why.. i in no way blame him for the loss because i no the problem lies in me.
but since the loss of our last pregnancy 9 weeks ago i have cut myself off from him i cant talk to him and cant bear 2 be near him. i love him with all my heart but i feel like i wanna run away and hide. he always trys 2 hug and kiss me but i wanna just sit alone.
he nos summat is up but i dont no whats up... i cant pin point it.
weve been arguing so much lately... i find him so immature for his age and his silly pranks and jokes push me further away...
i dunno wats rong or how 2 fix it!!

help me

Hugs

Hun i'm really sorry to hear of your loss.

I myself have miscarried in the past and i know that it can be very hard to deal with.
You need to be able to grieve in your own way but you also need to be able to speak with your husband.

I am married to an ex squaddie and i know that joking is a way that they find helps then cope with difficult situations so maybe he is hurting as much as you are but is hiding behind the jokes.

If i were you i would try and get some counselling to help you move on and learn to be able to communicate with your hubby.
Life is never easy and we all need a helping hand at times.
Don't push him away but just explain to him that you are hurting and at times you need some space so not to take your hurt out on him.

I really hope you work things out and that you stay strong together throughout your tests. xox

Hey sweety

i have some emotional issues of my own .. noting compaired to the scale of your problem sweety, but can i suggest you talk to a councilor .. they will be able to work out the root of your problem, or why you feel like you do .. i have alot of friends who have found great comfort in counciling.

also i suggest that if you truely love him jst tell him everythin u feel .. no matter how confusing it will probably be 2 him. i have found it alot easier in the past once i have told my partner y i feel/felt like i do/did and it really helped .. i know you dont know why you feel like you do exactly but try ..

also you may feel alittle like you do because what you feel about you misscarage is sooooo deep and serious .. and if your husband is acting imature you may feel cut off because your feel like he doesnt find it as emotionally moving and serious as you do.

i really do wish you luck sweety
if you want send me an email
katapillar_@hotmail.com
xxx