Hello Everyone,

I often find myself getting caught up in my emotions and having sex in the early stages of a relationship. This makes me feel like the relationship is based more on sexual tension than actual love and commitment. This makes me regret having sex at all. Almost like a guilty feeling. It sabotages the relationship.

I think the reason this happens to me frequently is beacuse of my intensely high sex drive. When Im in a relationship I usually have sex every single day. When Im not in a relationship I crave sexual encounters. So, the second a new relationship starts, Im already itching to get him in bed and feel connected to him. This is simply because i love sex and feeling pyhsically close to a man. I definately wouldn't say Im a sex addict (in case thats how this is sounding) its more like- Im looking for emotional connections in the wrong places.

So, all of this being said, I would like some advice on how to REFRAIN from sex in the early stages of a relationship. I have recently begun seeing a man, and I would like to connect on a deeper, cognitive level before we have sex. I think this will make the relationship stronger and make me feel more complete and confident in my choices.

Any tips, tricks and advice would be greatly apriciated!!!
Thanks!
Allie

WELL YOU JUST HAVE TO ACCEPT IT U ARE JUST A DIRTY LITTLE SLAGG HAHA GET A LIFE HEHEHEHE FREAK

Hmm if enjoying sex makes me "a dirty little slagg", then i guess thats what I am!! haha. is sounds like ur the one who needs to get a life. perhaps your uncomfortable with your own sex life so you need to bag on those who are sexually confident to feel better? whatever the reason, i wish you the best with your own emotional baggage and issues!!

Trust me, I've been there.
I'm Leni 31 years old mother of 7 (soon of 9!!) I've being married to my John for about 10 years but before that I lived pretty wild youth with a really high sexdrive In my 18-19's I dated the popular guys of my town and I found myself from their beds in the early stages of those relationships. (You don't say how old are you, but you seem young. Remember to enjoy it!) It was my choice but sometimes I really regrate it! I know what you're going through. When I met John I knew I'd marry this guy and I had very hard time on controlling my hormones! Remember, you always have your imagination. Dream,dream and fantasize. That what helped me. Get to know him well and I bet after you know some things of him I mean all those sweet things, exciting and adorable things of your man, making love is going to feel mind blowing! And think about it. U get a strong relationship when you don't give yourself right away to him. He'll respect you more when you play a little hard to get! He'll be just more excited of your first time together! (I'm sure he cant wate!) That's exactly what happened to me. When you know your man better it's going to be better! (Although sex with somebody you don't know that well can be as good..I don't know. But certanly you don't have all those feelings in sex with a stranger. I guess..) "Oh, he's gorgeous he loves kids, he's a grate cook, he's so gently and look at those muscles" that's I was thinking what we were kissing and cuddling. We had sex for the first time after dating of 4 and half months. I knew hm so well, I ha met his family and all
I guess you just know when the time is right. In that point You're just so in ecstacy that the whole world like disappears and it's like you 2 are all alone in this wonderful place, fulled of candles and the romantic music is playing on the backround. Well, that wasn't our place, but we had a LONG foreplay and the act itself..wow! it took the whole night! How cliche, but we had sex for the first time in a old barn on the bale of hay. (Ok, there was a thick blanket too) It was autumn and a bit cold and first he was just warming me up. I guess we wasn't suppose to have sex that evening but..I still remember that But I'm not going to tell it here becouse you'd be so bored! So, be strong. Get to know your guy and dream! Dream as much as your little heart just desires! Trust me, it helped a lot. Look what happened to me! We're still married, happy, soon parents of 9 (Oh my god!! I'm terrified but so excited!) and the lust, passion and love is still here!
Good luck, honey! Please let me know how are you doing!
Love, Leni