Help please, about sex

hi

ive been married for almost a year now both me an the hubby are still virgins, we both love each other so much..

everytime we attempt to make love we both be turned on and we want it realy badley
but when ever he trys to put it inside me i get so scared i feel like its gunna hurt so much an al my muscles just get all tensed its been like this for almost a year now i realy dont know what to do..

we tryed everything diffrent positions his tryed to be as gentle as he can and very suportive but i still get scared an tensed


we have talked about it so many times,
its stressing both of us out we want to start a family
an i know its hurting him so much

please can anyone help?

thank you

sam

Hello friend

My husband isn't much for candles and outfits either and we have been married for about a year and a half also. We have just had a son almost 8 months ago and it can be tough to get any action in between caring for our baby and my dear hubbie working so hard.

I have recently suggested we read a book that I have called HOT SEX by Tracey Cox. Another that I have called A complete idiot's guide to amazing sex looks good too. If you try to read those together if you can both be in the same place at the same time.... perhaps on weekends, then you can look for ideas. Try just exploring each other. Wake him in an interesting way and see where things go from there.

Good luck, I am sending out conception vibes
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candy
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<a ="http://www.trainwithmeonline.com"> Workouts</a>--Workouts

Painful sex

You should see your GP first, I can't believe that after a year you haven't sought help. By the way, has he eaten you out - that doesn't hurt and it might solve the problem. I was in Bosnia in the recent war and had a 16 year old refugee girl move into the flat my organisation had rented as she had nowhere to go. The price was sleeping with me (yes, I'm ashamed). At first she just used to lie there and not do anything, then on day three I ate her out, the first time for her. She was rigid at first with shock, I think, then she started to squirm and her legs parted involuntarily, eventually she had a great orgasm. After that I ... her almost there, and finish off with full sex until she soon was able to come with straight sex.

I can help.

there is a name for this, i think it's something like "vaginissimus", basically it means that all your muscles are tightening up so much that there's no way he can penetrate you, relaxation, lubricant and gentleness are what's needed, it won't hurt so don't worry, once you get going it'll be the best feeling ever. sex isn't something you need to be scared of. XX.

Your gp can help

I know its embarrasing, but I have heard of this before. Ring and ask for an appointment to see a lady doctor. I can't remember how it's solved,I think its a cream or muscle relaxant (I guess you can't use alcohol). You could ask her to give you a really strong painkiller to take in advance just for the first time..but please remember, it's only a bit of pain..it isn't agony, and tell yourself its over soon, and then doesn't hurt anymore.
hug
H

The worst thing you can do is stress out

I think the most important thing is to try and take some of the stress out of the whole "having sex" thing. Spending time caressing and cuddling each other and slowly moving onto foreplay without any thought of having sex is a good place to start.
Whatever anyone says, the first time I had sex it did hurt, but thinking back, if we`d used a lubricating jelly it may have made things a little easier.
I think that with most things we worry about it life, that the more time and energy you put into thinking about a situation, the more it is thrown out of preportion.
I hope these words help a little
Tracey x