I had 3 single old school friends round for drinks last night - they didn't turn up til 10pm after going to the pub! Anyway, I told them that ttc was on hold & how upset it had made me, only for one of them to then tell me that she had an abortion the other week!! Not only that, but she described the "event" of having a BFP HPT! & told me that she's on the fecking pill!!!

Now, I don't agree with abortion but hey, it's her choice & being the person I am, I stroked her arm & asked if she was ok. She was so blarzay about it all & acted as "oh well whatever". It's not mainly the fact that she has had an abortion that has p*ssed me off, but the fact that she told me after her knowing full well how I feel about the current situation & the fact that she's single & on the pill.

Not only did she pee me off about that but she said I should spend money on myself, go & get my hair cut - instead of the boring cut I have now! I flipped & said I'm not spending £50 on a hairdo when I haven't got that kinda money to be throwing around - she doesn't have a mortgage, okay she rents a house with mates - but doesn't have the same responsibilties as I do!

Ooohh I am fuming, & to top it all me & dp aren't speaking - AGAIN!! I cried myself to sleep lat night & still have a stonking headache now. I'm sorry to go on cos I don't want to drag anyone elses mood down. I just feel that my mood isn't gonna get any better & I've always said I can't be doing with depressives yet It seems like I'm turing into one - it's a downward spiral & I can't get out. I want me & dp to have a baby so so so much & it's breaking my heart that we have stopped ttc - even though I know it's not on hold forever - or is it? dp could hold off forever, maybe the money issue is an excuse - who knows!!

ARRRRggghhh

some people can b soooo insensitive! could she have not kept her trap shut knowing what ur going through. makes me really cross!

i think u really need to get through to ur dp how bad ur feeling about this. even if u write it down and leave it for him to read in his own time. that way there'll be no arguments(i'm assuming that was part of ur argument? sorry if i'm wrong). then in a couple of days just casually mention did he read it. it might work. i do it with OH quite alot and i do find it helps. we're both quite fiery,shouty people so when we fight neither of us really hears wot the others saying.

i really hope you work things out babes, its so not like u to be like this. just remember we're all here for you and we understand some of what ur feeling. here catch..{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{BIG HUGS}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

tc, gail xx

hi
maybe she didnt mean it nasty.was she p*ssed?but she really of said it nowing your situation.but i no how you feel my mate did it to me,and she new we were ttc and was only with the bloke a few month,and then she came mine for a shoulder to cry on.(some people are insenstive).50 quid for a hair do bloody hell were she go nicky bloody clarks lol.
linzi

was your friend drunk? I'm sure she didn't mean to be so insensitive. Some people are just so tactless. Anyway, i'd forget her and her petty comments, she sounds pretty insecure and irresponsible to me. Give her a wide berth.
What's happenin with DP, what did you fall out over? Have you agreed on a time when you'll start ttc again or is it just up for discussion at a later date. Can you tell him how sad it's making you? Maternal instincts are so powerful and can't just be switched off. I hate boys!

Rach x x x

When thinks are good, they are good. But once thy get bad, they seems to be as bad as end of the world. Your world. Believe me, crises are shortcut to heaven. Means: If we wouldn't know crises, we would not appritiate what we have, and we would not get forward or learn new thinks. When we are in crises, we grow, learn, explore and are finding out what true values of life are.
Life is too short and pressures.Don't waste the time and energy on unimportant things. Forget about your so called friend. It is her life, her ideas. Judging her is just going to hurt you, nobody else. She is not the only one in the world having abortion done! As you are not the only one in the world who is dreaming of a baby or a happy marriage.

You are sad and have no reason to be happy. You must do everything possible to find something that would make you feel good again. When was it the last time you felt happy for longer period of time? If you are happy, you shine, if you shine things go the right way.

Do not worry, this time will pass soon. Than you'll be ritcher, taller, smarter and happier. Peace with you. xxx

Thanks for your comments. I think my hangover got the better of me yesterday & so I was on a real downer. However, I'm ok today - although I have been to Toys R Us this morning, not a good idea when broody lol.

Anyhoo, I completely agree with Matelko about only being able to appreciate the good things after conquering the bad. DP & I have been here before as I'm sure 90% of other couples have - getting on each others nerves for no apparent reason, little things that accumulate but at the end of the day, really don't matter.

Here's to a brighter future for all, after all Spring is just around the corner, the sun is shining already.

B Lucky xx