Oh babes 
i so know how you feel. i've had treatment for ectopics where you need to go back week after week for blood tests to moniter hcg levels. i don't think you can even think about starting to get over the loss of ur baby till ur discharged from EPAU. i know what you mean about EPAU and pregnant women. although i would never wish this on anyone, i felt resentment when i see women coming out of the scan room, waving their photos with a big smile on their faces. this maybe sounds so horrible, and i don't mean it to be but once when i was there i saw a woman who obviously had had bad news and i felt, i don't know, almost like a kind of relief that i wasn't the only woman suffering. does that make sense?
men deal with things so totally different to us. i used to feel so resentful towards mike because i felt that, because he hid his feelings, that he didn't care. it was so wrong of me but it took me a long time(and a good few sessions with a councillor) to realise that he was grieving too, just in a different way. i used to scream and shout at him. i don't know how he managed to put up with me sometimes. we've both came through it tho and stronger than ever.
i won't say things like time heals, and things happen for a reason because those sort of comments don't help. i will say that one day in the future you'll realise that 1 day has gone by without thinking about it, then you'll realise that 2 days have gone by, then you'll come to realise that although you'll never forget about ur baby, you can live ur life again. thats when you'll realise that you'll want to try again although you'll be scared witless when you do.
reading back, i've not really helped cheer u up  although i hope it helps you to know that we know how you feel. {{{hugs}}}
tc, gail xx
| 
ff 
need to talk