Can anyone help??????????????????

I had my m/c on the 29th dec. I am still bledding and im still crying more than im not. Everyone keeps on saying that i should get back to work and pull myself together. But i just feel so bad everything that comes on the TV has some sort of baby or pregnancy test etc... on it. Im just finding it very hard. Does anyone else out there feel the same or do i have to pull myself toegther and move on. All i keep being told id that i should be happy that i can get pregnant. But that doesnt help me at all. We have been through so much to get here too. I have a 14yr old daughter from my 1st marriage which was bad. I had the reversal of sterilisation done in feb 07 and it worked on one side. We have been trying for 9 mths so when it happened we were so pleased and now this. I know that it worked a the docs told me after the opp so i really dont need people telling me that when i really am finding it really hard to cope at the moment in time. People just dont understand.

Please help me !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just a big thank you for all your help. Im off back to the docs today as still in pain and still bleeding so i will see what he is going to say.
Hope that 2008 is going to be a much year for us all. Well it really cant get any worse. Love and hugs to you all. And thanks XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XX

Hiya hon, i m/c 6 weeks ago and can honestly say it does get better. Obviously everyone recovers physically and emotionally at different rates but for me i was on another planet for the first 10 days, cried a lot and felt kind of numb and baffled. I bled for just under 2 weeks and unfortunately got an infection so had to have some antibiotics but following those felt much better physically. Emotionally is a different story. On the whole, i'm ok and feel like the normal me but i still have bad days (today wasn't great) and have a cry and then come and have a moan on here! I've had my first period which was long and heavy and was hard to get through as it reminded me of the m/c but i also felt glad that things inside were working. I'm now able to think about starting to try again but am not going to rush. Many people have said to me 'at least you know you can conceive' and worse 'it's not like it was a real baby yet' GGGrrrrrrr but they do only mean well. They obviously have no idea how it actually feels. Remember honey, it's only very early days but we girls are made of tough stuff and things will get better. Just take care of yourself, physically and emotionally and give yourself the time to recover. Come and chat on here if you ever need to cos we are always here,

Rach x

Sorry to hear you've been through this too, I only m/c 5 days ago so I've not really got any wise words yet on when it starts to get better but I definitely feel like you. The girls on here all talk a lot of sense and I feel cr*p now and cry all the time too, I'm sick of the bleeding which just doesn't seem to be getting better, but I'm sure it will all lift with time like they say.

I went back to work today though and now I'm home and I feel so drained and sort of lonely, hardly any of them seemed to care (they've even been piling the work up for me while I've been off sick!)and I just wasn't ready for that stoney silence/response when I went back. I didn't want them tip-toeing round me or anything but I definitely got the opposite!

Some of the girls on here told me it was too soon and they were right, I only went to try and get a bit of normality back but physically and mentally I doubt it's done me any favours. If you can avoid going back yet and being at home is where you want to be then I would say take time out for yourself.

I'm also struggling to find any consolation in the "at least you can get pregnant" line, I'd rather have had another 6 months of trying than go through this hell...

Post or PM me anytime if it helps hun, you're certainly not alone.
Nikki xxx

the pain does get better, but it takes time and these insensitive people telling you to 'pull youself together' and 'get back to work' really dont have clue what they're talking about and should keep their mouths shut.

I had 2 mc in a year, the last one being in July 07, and I was off for several weeks following both. You have lost a child, no matter if the doctors tell you it's just a bunch of cells or people say you should be happy you can get pregnant. All I can say is they obviously havent experienced the loss.

Ignore them honey, take as much time as you need and if it makes you feel better ask them if they've ever lost a child!! It soon shuts them up.

Give youself time to grieve, give your body chance to get rid of the hormones which are not helping you at all at the moment and only do things you feel ready to do. No one will thank you for rushing back to work and you wont do yourself any favours by doing things you're not ready for.

Be gentle with yourself, you deserve it. It will happen for you, it just takes a little time.

I hope this helps - feel free to pm me if you need a chat.

love and hugs

Sarah & Jelly 16+1 week. xxxx

i'm really sorry to hear of your sad news, it's such a difficult thing to deal with!
peoples opinions really annoy me, they clearly think they're helping but like hell they are, all we really need is for people to listen and not give their words of wisdom like 'atleast you can get pregnant', 'there's plenty of time'...
to be honest stuff what everyone advising do what you feel best and not what others tell you. i had a missed miscarriage in nov 06 had an erpc on the 15th and was back at work on the 21st, far too early i realise now. i did go through a really rough time at the beginning of last year ended up seeing a counsellor perhaps that's something that may help you.i have to say it took me until about october 07 to get back to my old self, but everyone is diferent and it depends on how you deal with things, i also found writing things down a big help i ranted and swore and there was no one to judge what i'd writen so it was a huge release!
atleast coming on this site you know everyone has been through the same sort of thing so we all understand what your going through, post a message on here anytime or private message me, i'll listen.
take care and i hope your getting all the love and support you need from your family.
love laura x

as much time as you need, and don't listen to anyone who tells you to "pull yourself together"!

I lost my baby on 25th October 2007 and still feel the pain, though not as often. Crying probably down to once a week now, so it is getting better.

What you're going through is one of the hardest experiences I have ever known, and it isn't helped by the constant reminders of pregnancy which we may not have really noticed before.

You will come through the other side of this and remember, what doesn't kill us makes us stronger.

Take care,

Lisa x