hi i totaly no how you feel.
linzi

posted here before but just briefly i had a missed miscarriage last november. the last 8 months have been a bit of a rollercoaster one minute i'm fine the next feel really down and fed up and can't stop crying.
one thing that seems to affect how i feel is when i find out about friends and other people that i know are pregnant. it just seems to make me feel really down, which might sound silly but i just can't help feelin jealous i suppose and questioning it every time "why is it ok for them and not me"
i feel very alone in the way i feel because i don't think my husband can understand why i feel the way i do about these peoples pregnancies. obviously i wouldn't want them to go through what i did but i still can't help feeling the way i do about them being pregnant.
just wondered if anyone else feels the same.

Hi There,
I know exactly how you feel!!! I had my first missed-miscarriage last Feb, and only found out at the 12 week scan (after already having 3 scans, and being told that everything was OK), I then had an ectopic in October, and another complete miscarriage in Feb this year!!! I am now sat at my PC, thinking that I may be about to start my 3rd Miscarriage!!!!
You can't help but look at all the bumps people have, and somehow hate them!!! Since my first pregnancy, atleast people have either got pregnant, or had their babies, and it really makes me down ... why them and not me!!! What did I ever do wrong!!!
My husband tries, but just keeps saying don't let it get you down, or it willhappen one day, which really doesn't help!!!
Sorry if this sounds really morbid, or selfish, but I feel that I have no one to talk to, and I feel on edge!!!!
I'm glad though that its not just me who feels like this!!!
Take care everyone!!!

hi i totaly no how you feel.
linzi

I know exactly how you feel, I think we've spoken before. I've has two miscarriages, one of which happened just a wk and a half ago. Both times one of my friends has announced their pregnancies at about the same time, one of them has a healthy baby boy and the other is having a lovely healthy pregnancy. I was so jealous, I was cross and find it so hard to get at all excited for them. I feel like a cow, but it's not something I do on purspose - I think it's totally natural.

I hate seeing women with bumps and like you question where the fairness is. Dont be hard on yourself, give yourself a break - you deserve one. You've been through a tough time and you are certainly not alone in feeling the way you do.

Take care hun.

Sarah. xx

yeah we have spoken before. thank you though for leavin a message. how are you feelin, stupid question i know. have you gone back to work yet or are you still giving yourself some time.
i had been feelin ok for the last few weeks but then found out that,a friend of my husbands who's wedding we went to back in april is expecting their first baby and it just seems to have been playing on my mind. nearly every month since my miscarriage i've found out about someone i know becoming pregnant all with varying stories behind them and i just wish i could get away from everything to do with pregnancy. went on holiday back in may and there was about two pregnant women there, just can't get away from it.
really wish i didn't feel the way i do but i just don't want to know about others peoples happy news, sounds selfish i know but can't help it.
sorry to go on.
take care love laura.

You're not alone! It's nothing to do with wanting other people to suffer you just want it to be ok for you too. Don't beat yourself up, think it's natural to feel jealous when what they have is all we want. I had to go to EPU yesterday to have my 3rd m/c confirmed. they've all happened in last 12 months so know about rollercoasters too! Had to sit there while everyone else had their routine scans and went off home happy and pregnant. Jealous doesn't even start to describe how I felt. Just wanted you to know there's plenty of us know exactly how you feel, husbands don't always get it do they? Love mine to bits but finding it easier to talk to people who understand. Hope this helps, take care hun,

Clare xxx

thank you so much for your message means alot to know theres others out there who understand.
i'm so sorry to hear of loss for the third time, mother nature really is unfair! i know i've found it hard after 1 miscarriage so i can't begin to try and understand how you must be feelin.
this site has really been a brilliant find for me as it gives you the chance to talk about what we've been through, because i don't know about you but friends and family just don't mention it and i think my husband does get fed up with me feelin the way i do.
anyway i'll stop goin on hear to listen(read) anytime
take care.
laura x

No-one knew about my first except my husband but I'd told some of my family with the 2nd and none of them knew what to say when I lost it. I understood that but anything would have been better than nothing. Know what you mean bout this site, least you know you're not alone. Know I'm nosy and obviously you don't have to tell me anything but you don't say whether you're trying again or not? I was convinced yesterday I didn't want to try again but am already changing my mind just wondered if that's normal I suppose! Message me anytime and go on as much as you like hun it's gotta be healthier to get it off your chest! Take care,

Clare xxx

thank you again for messagin again feelin really down at the mo and just don't feel that i can talk to my husband as i said i think he gets fed up of hearing me go on.
we're not trying at the mo. we did start back in january but after three months nothing was happening and that was making me feel worse, so i decided to go back on the pill and sort out a few things in my life like getting a new job.
last week though something just clicked and i felt that i was happy to start trying again, but after talking to my husband we decided to leave it now till next year.
you've got to do whatever makes you happy and not rush things i think, if you feel your'e ready then go for it.
take care and look after yourself
love laura

Hi, just find this discussion girls and I'm so glad, because I feel exactly the same!! Everything what I feel was already describe. Since I got pregnant first time last year and lost my baby girl after 22weeks most of my friends and colleagues get pregnant and already have their healthy babies. My very good friend told me 3 weeks after my m/c, that she is pregnant - just after I stopped crying!! I can't believe how some people can think I would be happy for them! Who didn't go through loosing a baby will never understand what it takes.
I lost my second baby girl in April this year and of course more of my friends get pregnant and at work is just night mare too. Watching walking pregnant colleagues all day is just too much, but I cant change it! I just cant stand to even look at them!! I feel very jealous and sometimes I even hate them when I hear them talking about pregnancy (like how much weight did they gain!,or poor me I have such a big stomach) and laughing happily so every one can here them. I know is not their fault, but cant stand it. I feel very bad, I dont want to feel hate or jealousy or I even caught myself of thinking that maybe something bad will happened to them too.I wish not, but its like a devil inside of me.
I know I will be 100% ok only after I have my baby
So don't worry you feel this way, most of us do too.
Danks1

hi,
its normal to feel the way that you do, i have had 3 miscarriages within an 18 month time span, im so desprate to have another child to complete my family, i have an 8 year old son, just goes to show how long ive been trying, ive recently been to see a gynaecologist who did a laparoscopy and found i have endometriosis over my right ovary, he cut most of the scarring away but it is still effected about 40 percent. He wants me to try clomid ( a fertility drug which makes you ovulate more). So fingers crossed things will happen soon. People who havent been through miscarriage dont seem to understand how it affects you psychologically, you try to get on with life only to be knocked off your perch when you find out the gift of life has been given to someone else, who doesnt spare your feelings and whom doesnt dserve it as much as you. Anyway best of luck to everyone out there and keep smiling, thats all you can do.