im having my abourtion on wednesday. im 23 and i already have three children and i want to go back to college so anougher baby would be to much for me. i dont know how im going to feel having it done though. im so nervous and i think im going to cry the whole way through. your mum should be proud of you not being the way she is. your being very sencible! most girls your age would have it get a counsil house and sit on benifits. but your not. i hope your ok and good luck xxxxx

I have never struggled with something so much in my life! i have been thru so much before but this is killing me! i am 19 pregnant and beyond coping! I am 12 weeks and when i found out i sobbed for days on end as a knew what my fate was! i told only my boyfriends family and they offered me their support as did he! i have already been to the hospital to get a termination and seconds before the procedure i couldnt do it! the entire time i was in the hospital i was beside myself! it was then i decided i was going to keep it despite having no oney and no where to live. I then phoned my mother who i havent got a good relationship with to tell her and she said she was ashamed of me and disgraced that i was lucky my father was already dead or he would be to! my boyfriend is also 19. i wasnt careless and although i know anything is possible i have endometriosis and was told id never have children! so many ppl i expected to be there for me have turned there backs on me and now my boyfriend and i have started arguing more and i just feel so alone in the world but decided to go thru with the termination as i know i cant support a child please help!!!!

Hi, my name is Nikki and although by the time u recieve this message u may have already had the abortion, just my opnion i think u should keep the baby. I was in the same situation 2 yrs ago and my baby girl has giving me so much joy and strength and i know it was fate. I am currently 8 wks pregnant with my 3rd child and a week ago i made a appointment for a termination but thought i needed more imformation on the procedure ect. Within moments of looking on the net about the facts of abortion and what they dont tell u i was crying my eyes out and have decided to keep my baby, anyhow at the same time sometimes it is best that we dont know.
Anyway I hope u are coping ok and wish u well.

im having my abourtion on wednesday. im 23 and i already have three children and i want to go back to college so anougher baby would be to much for me. i dont know how im going to feel having it done though. im so nervous and i think im going to cry the whole way through. your mum should be proud of you not being the way she is. your being very sencible! most girls your age would have it get a counsil house and sit on benifits. but your not. i hope your ok and good luck xxxxx

Hey sweetie...just a note to let you know that you are NOT alone in the world. This is just a moment in time, and in the grand scheme of life, this is just a second.

Look at the big picture. I too had an abortion about a year and a half ago...It was a hard day, and I still think of it. I am now expecting with a great man.

One more thing to think about....this is a MIRACLE child. You shouldn't be pregnant but you are. Consider adoption. This child may be here for a reason. I was adopted as an infant, but I do support both decisions.

With Thoughts and Prayers,

Angela

Hi everyone thank you for your enormous support! i just pray that i can clear my head of all the confusion, hurt and sadness and make the right decision! there is so many unknowns that i am just in a whirlwind of whats and what if's!

god bless to you all for being so supportive!

all my love
xxx
troubled2

Hi,

My heart goes out to you in your difficult situation, especially as you said that you have lost your father, and your mother is being less than helpful. I cannot imagine how hurtful it must feel to have people you expect to support you turn their backs on you.

Something tells me though that you are a fighter. You have had a tough life up to now, and you are able to take care of yourself. You know in your heart that you want to keep your little baby, but everyting around you is falling apart.

You know what? There is nothing shameful in being pregnant. It is a beautiful privelage for any woman to have a little child grow in her womb. This is a gift that men will never experience, and some women unfortunately aswell.

Apart from the emotional heartache of how your mom is treating you it seems like your biggest problems are practical - how will you cope financially with a baby, where will you live, how about your further education and job prospects?.

There are many crisis pregnancy centers which can help you out with the nuts and bolts of the practicalities, they are there to help you specifically with this. If you PM me with the location of the nearest big town to you I will do some research and get back to you with some practical info.

I know there is a secret fear that if you abort this baby you will not get another chance, and I think that would be terrible. It may be right, it may not, but you dont want to take the chance.

On the bright side, your bf and his family will support you.

Everything happens for a reason, and it is no mistake that you are now pregnant, trust me on that one!

Big hugs,

Siobhan

I really feel for you as i am also 12 wks and due to have a termination next week and i still dont know if what i am doing is for the best, dont know if i can go through with it, it is such a hard decision and no1 can really help you make it as only you know what is in your head and heart. I was in a similar situation to you when i was 22, i had just left my b/f who was violent and was living in a safe refuge when found out i was pregnant even though i had been told at 16 that i would be unlikely to have children due to severe scarring in my tubes and uterus, my first thought was to abort but it was the thought of this being my one chance that made me decide against it and my daughter is now 6. I wont lie as it was really hard having her but i was given a home by the council and a social worker and health visitor gave me lots of support and helped me with everything i could need so if you did go ahead you would not be alone as there is support out there to help but if you do feel that a termination is best then please dont worry that this will be your 1 chance as i have gone on to have 5 pregnancies since my daughter which shows that doctors do not always get it right especially when you are young, anything can happen.I think only you know how you feel deep down and what your gut feeling is about this and that is usually the best thing to listen to, regardless of what anyone else says or thinks. Hope all works out ok for you and you get all the support and help you need, whatever you decide. take care.

I just read your thread and felt really sad for you. You obviuosly want to keep this baby but are feeling pressurised into the abortion by other people.

If you havent got a very good relationship with your mother I wouldnt worry to much about her opinion or anyone elses for that matter. Its you that has to look after the baby not someone else. Its what you and your boyfriend wants that matters. How does your b/f feel about the baby?

I have never had an abortion but I am not against it. I feel every person has there reasons so others shouldnt judge, but you must feel something for this child to not have gone through with the 1st abortion, especially as you have been told you cannot have any children.

As for money and no where to live it all works out in the end. I am 28, married with 4 children and no 5 due in July. We live in a 3 bedroom house (which is now getting a bit cramped to say the least) and my husband doesnt earn a forune but we manage. I am so proud of my 4 lovely boys. They are the best thing that has ever happened to me. I was 21 when I had my 1st and am going to be 28 on my 5th.

Anyway please let me know how you get on and PLEASE dont feel pressured into doing something you dont want.

I hope you make the choice which is right for you

Take care

Sarah 12+4

xx

I know how you feel. I recently found out i am pregnant with number 4 and we cannot finacially provide for this child and i feel a termination is what is best for me and my family.
However, it doesnt stop me feeling sad and confused nearly 24/7!
I dont think anyone that has an abortion does not feel this pain regardless of wether or not it is the right decision.
One day i tell myself i need to protect the little life inside me and then other days i just know another baby so soon isnt really practical.
Its such a hard decision and nobody can force you into it.
If you do keep this baby YOU will manage. Im sure you would get help with money etc.
Good luck in whatever you decide.

I was 21 when I first fell pregnant and my sister cried whenI told her and my Mum flipped out! I felt so alone even though I also had support from my partner and his family.

The thing is people do come round, eventually. I thought I may never speak to my Mum again when in fact my little boy just made us closer. Now I have two children and she is not fussed about seeing me anymore .. it is all about them.

I hope it all works out for you, whatever you chose.

XX Take care XX