18 and pregnant

Hello, I am 18 years old and about 5 weeks pregnant. My mom just found out and she really wants me to get an abortion. Even my sister who is 24 wants me to have an abortion. I can't believe she would tell me to do this. I really don't want to get rid of this baby. I know it will be hard and i know i will miss out on alot of things in life, but i am ready. I would never be able to live with myself if i had an abortion!!! I have talked to my boyfriend about it and we're planning on getting married. I just wish I had support from my family, but they all don't want me to have this baby...i'm so confused i don't no what to think..does anyone have any advice it would be much appreciated!

Heya

Im 18 and atm 14 and a half weeks pregnant, me and my bf were really happy when we found out and luckily my mum was really supportive however hes mum said she wanted us to have a abortion and if we didnt then he wer'nt allowed to stay at home and hes sister threatend to split us up and stop us seeing eachother and generally hes family said some pretty harsh stuff.. However since then he has moved in with me because we decided its our baby so we have the right to keep it, If i was you id do what i did, sit and talk with your boyfriend and if you think you's are ready and want this baby then prove to your parents you can do it, you wont be alone recently ive found out about lots of help thats available so your not alone hun
plus since my bf's family's first reaction things have dramatically changed they have come around to the idea because we stuck at showing them we cud do it without them ...
Good luck with everything
xx

Your parents will come around!!

When my best friends parents found out she was pregnant they wouldn't talk to her and threatened to throw her out unless she had an abortion. She kept the baby against their wishes and within a few weeks of getting used to the idea they were fully supportive. The language in your post "I am ready" sounds as if you don't want an abortion, From personal experience. If you don't want one. It'll be so hard to get over. You have to make the decision that only you can make and that you'll be happy with. Be selfish and decide what YOU want xxx

My daugter was pregnant

I let her make her own choice........yet I told her I taught it would be better for an abortion. Yet she seemed decided to have her baby. so it would be Ok I would be a grandmother, no one new other that her boyfriend my boyfriend. I told her that if she made her decision to keep her baby we need to call my doctor so she can take her vitamins. Next thing I know she went trough the abortion she is so sad and I am sadden for her too. If your heart says you want yoru baby than keep your baby. I wish my daugter listened to her heart but somehow things change. She crys and crys everyday its know been 4days since the abortion. My heart cannot stand her pain anymore. I wish we could go back 5 days ago.

Dont rush in to anything!!!!

i had my first baby at 16 yrs old, im 27yrs now and 12wk pregnant with my second. while my son has been growing up i have been doing courses and getting myself an education.do what you want not what anyone eles wants you to do, your the one thats gonna have to live with the descision.

jane. take care x

..

If your boyfriend is okay with it, you're ready AND you really don't want to get rid of this baby, then don't have the abortion. You'll be fine.
I had my abortion today and it's the worse thing in the world, everyone is different and reacts differently, but if you really feel that you're ready, and look into your heart to find what you really feel, then go for it. If you have any doubt, talk to counsellors, people who aren't involved in your life and who it won't affect. And remember, abortions are done up until 20 weeks. The only thing is, you should decide quickly, I was at 14.2 weeks and the foetus was ... developed. I killed a being today and I.. whatever, just follow your heart. Really. You know what you want, don't hesitate. And remember, people here aren't professionals, we're all a bunch of women going through the same thing and pretty much all want the same thing - to keep our baby - that's why we come on this forum. And we all understand each other and support each other the way WE want to be supported. Go see a professional, they might give you different perspectives for you to look at.

All the best xoxo

Sorry jen

Hi Jennifer,

Sorry to hear about your abortion, the way you were posting last week I thought you were going to keep your baby. You probably feel pretty awful right now, I cant even imagine, but just know that there is a lot of support for you out there, just dont be afraid to ask.

All the best to you too
Siobhan xxx

Me

ok so sounds like the same thing that happend to me but a little different this guy that i likeed came and picked me up at my house met my parents and they said i had to be back at a certain time well i wanted to spend the night which i did but i got in big trouble basically had a one night stand and i am on the pill but i think im still pregnant cause i was on my period when i had sex and he didint use a condum and now im having my period about 3 weeks before im saposto and i took a pregnency test about a week ago and it was negative but my belly is getting bigger and im hungry more and more moody and im gnna take another one but my mom knows my dad dont cause he would kill me and my mom wants me to have an abortoion but they thought of that just kills me killing and inocent child idk what to do

U hav your answer

u shudnt be confused: "I really don't want to get rid of this baby"...// "i am ready"
thats what you said in your blog.... if your family loves you then eventually they will support you!

Nooo dont get rid

your family should be supporting u rather then telling u to have an abortion if u have an abortion u will regret it.
if u feel its the right time to have a baby u have it its ur choice at the end of the day no 1 elses

All i can say

Hey hun

Ive been where you are and i didnt listen to my heart and made the worse decision and had the abortion because everyone wanted me to have it. It was the worse decision of my life and i regrett it like no tomorrow.

If you in your heart want it and feel ready go for it, keep your baby. Prove them wrong that it IS the right decision because its right for YOU.

Wish you all the best

Hey

hey i am 18 too and in the exact same situation. Im around 8 weeks pregnant and my mum wants me to have an abortiin but i just cant doit. i want my baby. ive been with my boyfriend for almost a year. He's 24 and very supportive. my advice for you is the same as i am following... if you want your baby and your boyfriend does too then go for it. At the end of the day it is up to you two and as soonas your baby comes along your mum and sister will love it unconditionally anyway ! hope that helped. xx

19 and feeling your pain

Dear ana0214,

I am also pregnant and Im 19 years old. If you think you are ready for this baby and can support her or him, then do what you think is right. Your family may not be on the same page as you right now but they will get over this and support you either way. If you show them you are making plans and taking responsibility for you actions they'll know your ready. If your boyfriend is truly ready and is honesty going to help support you and this baby I say go for it hunnie!

There is always a way.

I'm eighteen, married to a partner of the same sex and trying for a baby. I,m also a god mum to my best friend paige's little girl, lily. SHe is only a week and a bit old and the most beautiful miniature human being i've ever seen.

My wife and i are currently studying to start our own business.

Paige is a brand new mum at just eighteen and so far she is a better mother than most older mums that i know. Lily is surrounded by so much love and really, if you have love for your child, then there is always a way. things will always work out.

I know in my heart, that you will follow yours and i support WHAT EVER decision you decide to make.

if you want an abortion because you know you cant love and support a child then get one. people think abortion is selfish, but that isa not always the case. if you were to bring a child into suffering and torment, then wouldnt that be more terrible for that child? I'm not saying you should have an abortion, but incase you decide to FOR YOUR OWN RESONS remember that it takes alot of courage, maturity and selflessness to do so. DO NOT LET ANYONE MAKE THE DECSION FOR YOU. you are the one that has to live with abortion, or a child for thew rest of your life, not them, ok?

If you decide you and your fiance wish to keep the child then, congratulations! I know you will be wonderfull parents, regardless of your age.

try to surround yourself with people who support you. dont associAte with people that are unsupportive. they will only bring you down.

... i've just looked at the date on your post and figured that my advice is way to late. I'd like to know what choice you made. brambram_81@hotmail.com

Please let me know?
Kero. X x

I am also 18 and pregnant

hey, I understand what you are going threw right now. I found out that I am currently 2 months pregnant. I told my family and because they are very catholic they want me to keep the follow threw with the pregnancy. However my boyfriend wants nothing to do with it. All he wants is the abortion because he cant support the child and we do not live together. I understand where he is coming from but at the same time I dont know if throwing away the "problem" is the responsible or right thing to do.

In your situation it is hard. I know your family means everything to you. But at the same time if your mother aborted you, you would not be here or have that family. If you feel like it is the right thing to do then by all means that is your life. But with that you also have to understand making this decision with the support of your parents is still a very hard decision to make. Follow your heart and if your family doesnt want to be there for you all you need is your friends and although you do not know me but i am in the same situation you can e-mail me when ever you would like. Just think about what it is you want and what you can handle and support. Love is a strong meaningful relationship and you should tell your family that love is not conditional. they should really grow up and stop being so selfish.

Im 18 and pregnant to

hiya, im alos 18 and 9 weeks pregnant, thankfully my mum and dad ar ok with it, however me and my boyfriend decided to wait until we told them we decided to sort everything out before hand like how we would live and where? income and how it would affect us. Try and talk to your family show them that you and your boyfriend are ready and prepared, you know it wont be easy but obviously you have your head screwed on and you seem really mature. we wanted to prove to everyone that we were ready, it may take them some time but i bet once your little one is out and they hold him/her for the first time their hearts will just melt. im so looking forward to our new arrival who is due on the 3rd november. good luck with everything, they will soon see that your ready x

I was 18 and pregnant!

Hey I know how you feel! When I was 18 I was pregnant! Me and my partner was going to have the baby! We were all for it, he already had a little boy that we looked after alot so it wasnt a big deal for him and the fact I had been loooking after a little boy for over a year didnt bother me either I knew what to do and was ready as you are!

I told my family they were happy for me, I went for my 3 month scan, everything was fine! They sh*t hit the fan (as they say) I was in the bath just after my 4th month and I started to bleed, it was like the heaviest period I had ever had in my life, I knew it wasnt healthy. Called my partner and he cried. I called the midwife and I had had a miscarriage at 4 months!!!!!!

I had to go the next day and have a surgical abortion to get rid of my child out of me! I have to say it was the worst feeling in the world....

Basically I think you should, if your ready... got for it but please be careful, I was so careful did everything by the book and well it didnt work out for me! Im pregnant now and Im having an abortion as I am too scared and think Im still too young to have a baby now...

Just be careful! and GOOOOD LLLUUUCK!!!!!

Advice

Hi there,

I've just read your reply to a post and noticed that you had a miscarriage followed by a surgical abortion which you said was horrible.
You're pregnant now but scared and have decided to have an abortion.
I know that you've made your mind up, but I just want to offer a bit of advice from my own experience.

A while ago I was in a situation similar to you and I felt that I couldn't go through with a pregnancy. But once all the shock and panic had gone away, and now Ive got a little older, I feel the complete opposite of how I did back then.
Sometimes, what feels like the right thing to do, or what feels like the only realistic option, isn't right at all - it's just your body's way of dealing with a traumatic experience. It's sort of natural to look for a way out of a difficult situation, to keep life as you know it, but that's not natural - life does go on.

I truly appreciate what it feels like to be shocked, scared or panicky about a pregnancy, but in these situations its important to remember what's really happening. It can be easy to focus on the decision that you've made and grey out the reality, but after an abortion the reality suddenly hits home, and by then it's too late.
You said that having the surgical abortion after you'd miscarried was horrible, but think how you'll feel if you abort knowing that you killed a child.
That little baby is a baby - it knows if it's a boy or a girl, if it's got dark hair or light hair etc and although at the moment it's natural to look at all the negatives, you have to remember that bringing a child into the world is an amazing thing. It can be hard at times, but the other times make it all worthwhile, especially at special occasions.

This baby has everything it needs to grow into a person that you'll share your life with as you get older, except for one thing - a chance.

I know it's hard, but try not to focus on the immediate future, but look long term. This baby inside of you is someone that will share their life with you, you'll watch her grow up, through the first day at school, to exams, to her first job and one day, you could be a Grandmother to her children. Think of what both you and your baby will miss out on if you abort her.

I hope this helps,

All the best

God bless

Im in your boat(ish)

I'm also 18 and almost 4 months pregnant. unlike you though my family wants me to keep the baby or give it to another family. my boyfriend and i want the baby now that we have truly talked about all of the options. in the beginning though i was so torn. i knew it would be selfish of me (in a way) to end this baby's life and continue on with mine as if nothing ever happened, and also the fact that i have a scaler ship from a great college for my voice and my boyfriend makes straight A's. but we have decided to give that all up and raise our baby. and like you said, it will be hard,but it is something that we have to deal with now because of what we've done. i could never give up my baby to another person or just throw his or her life away. i think that i would always have a whole in my heart that i could never fill something that can never be fixed. i don't know what to tell you to do. i mean I'm just as confused as u are I've just had a little more time to think about all this. and your baby is yours not your moms and defendants not your sisters and ultimately it is you and your boyfriends choice what you do and what rout you take. and remember, everything happens for a reason.

>Miranda

18 and possably pregnant

If you truely want to have that baby then by al means have that baby. Do not let anyone try to talk you out of it. If people don't like your decision they will either have to learn to live with it or just forget it. Personaly anyone who even mention abortion should not be able to voice their oppinions, because abortion is killing even if it just a fetus. I wish you the best of luck in your new journey. Just reamber one step at a time and one day at a time.

I am also 18 and pregnant.

Whatever you do dnt listen to your family. Iv had it all already of my family and friends. But they get used to the idea after a wile.

I am stil goin threw some of the things your goin threw. But im looking for a house now becos I crnt live at home. I wunt beable to live with myself if I got rid of a child. Dnt worry you will get the support of your family eventually jst giv them some time.