Not sure

hi i used to self harm probably everyday, an if im so stressed i will resort to it again even though i dont like it. i'm very emotional and depressed i'm seeing a councillor at the moment but i've always felt fat, ugly and a freak, my mates try to help but i'm just so low. recently i've started making myself sick by forcing the end of a toothbruth down my throat to throw up. i get upset but i feel much better after i do it. ive been doing this for 2 weeks after every meal, i only have maybe 1 or 2 meals a day. i used to not eat but all my mates had a go at me and i thought if i eat in front of my friends then go the toilet i can throw up and they wont suspect anything, its taking over my life, i'm getting even more petrified to go outside recently because i think that people will look at me and call FAT! i dont get bullied but i just cant help thinking this. someone help please. (i cant tell my councillor! or parents! just dont want to!)

does anybody understand?

Re not sure

you sound as if you are having a rough time but trust me there are people who can help you you must tell someone.maybe a friend?what you are doing can damage your throat at the very least.please tell someone all the help you need is there for you just ask it is hard i know but that first step of asking for help makes you feel better.i know. i do understand .be safe

Worried

i really do want to tell a friend but im scared to, when a friend told her best friend she was making herself sick she gave her this weird expression and told her she was a freak. i dont want to be called a freak, im just so scared :'(

Re worried

you are not a freak and i know asking for help can be scary but trust me you will be glad when you do.plus being scared for a little while really beats being scared for the rest of your life.take care.

Me 2

Ok Well I'll be 14 in April And Well I am A self harmer 2!!! my mom doesn't know and I see a counsiler once a week so they check me and my harms (Even though I hide the cuts!!)
About a week ago I started to make myself thro up!!! And I know its bad But like Im so over weight its not Funny!!! And like I like the way I feel... Im actually the happiest When
I cut cause when I do Im at my best... I make A's and am a good kid!!! Its just my way of getting stress of!!! When I stopped I was always crying Making F's and just unbearable!!! So should I stop even tho Im happy????

Hmm

Hi, well i know how you feel it does let the stress go and im 15 at the end of the month! i think you shuld take up a sport or something if you're really over weight,i just can't give up being who i am. i dont eat when i fell fat which is like everyday, maybe a small bit of something to eat but i don't care about my eatin, to be honest im hardly that hungry now so its ok for me, i might starve myself sometimes or if im tempted to eat i'll cut my arms, leg, stomach, etc... but i force my self to throw up even when i haven't eaten anything, i think you're only getting F's because your upset and sad and its affecting your work. my mom and dad didn't know about me self harming but saw my arms when i wasn't concentrating. it sucked.
i hope you get betta xxx

Re me 2

you say your happy then why do you hurt yourself?if someone else was doing this to you how would you feel?you are not a bad person you dont deserve to be hurt.what about getting rid of the stress by swimming or karate or even just goin out for a walk.take care.