I feel so low sometimes and need to snap out of it

hi ya everyone finally a forum where some people feels like me , the thing is i feel quit silly as some times i feel fine and happy but then something snaps and i feel the lowest that i can cry and not want to go out the house i feel like people are talking about me and disscussing me and quite often feel like people dont like me or are laughing at me when im not watching , ive never felt like this before , its knocked me confidence to the point of i dont feel pretty at all actually i feel very ugly which is quite worrying as im getting married in september and my dress is due to arrive in the bridal shop soon and i dont want to feel like this when i go to try it on , i feel very lonely which i shouldnt cos ive got the most amazing hubby and 3 kids but i think its cos i have no friends i live in my partners town which is 200 mile away from my family dont get me wrong i love it here and would never move back to my home town but ive been here 2 yrs now and the only people i know is his family but thats the other problem his family there lovely in there own way but all they seem to do at the minute is frustrate me mil is very interfeering trys to overtake recently had an outburst and she seems to have backed off but now i feel more talked about between the family , i do go to the gym but used to go regularly with my sil but due to a big number of excuses she hasnt been for ages and ive turned very paranoied walking down to gym myself i seem to get very scared walking on my own on a night , never used to as the dark never bothered me but now cant walk anywhere on my own at night which is affecting my weight and thats another thing that gets me down as ive got polysistic ovaries which if anyone has it will know how hard it it to loose weight with it and polysistic causes facial hair which i have to get rid of everyday which makes me very very paranoid and the only way to reduse the symtoms is loose weight , i cant talk to any of my family about this as theyll just think i dont like it here ,and my parents died 17yrs ago when i was 16 three months apart but yeh im never going to be massivly happy with them not being here but deeply think in my head loosing them is not my problem at the min as ive learnt to cope with that aspect of my life i went through a few deep bad years but feel as if ive accepted that part of my life , must admit typing all this down feels good , think i just need encouragement to get motivated as if i start going back to gym i`ll gradually feel more confident and better about myself then wont feel as paranoid about everything oh my god ive just answered my own problem xxxxxx