Grieving

Hi,

Bad topic probably, but how do people cope with losing someone close? How long does it take for every small detail to stop playing over and over again in your head and to stop feeling sad?

Wendz

I know how you feel!

I lost my father in September aged 96 years, and feel the loss each day. I believe in God and knew that my father also believed and worshiped God and believed in the very heart of his soul that he would go to see his maker when he died. Because of this, I take peace for myself that he is with God now, and that one day I shall see him in Heaven. Not a day goes by when I remember all the good times we had together, and although our lives were like most people full of worries and anxieties, it is the good memories that keep me from day to day. Hang on to them, and I am sure you will find that the future holds good and bad times but through it all you will come through with all your good memories of your dear mother.
All the best, will be thinking of you,
Jammie 58

Hi again

Yes, you can find lots of local churches around where you live. The Church of England churches are very friendly. Ask around lots of churches are running "alpha" courses all the time and you can go along and make friends in an easy environment. You can find local churches on the internet too with a search engine under "christian churches".
I have a close colleague at work who lost her husband the day before my father, and both of us have our good and bad days. We talk a lot about how we feel, and this does help, but we know it will take a long time to feel the same again. Talking to a close friend usually helps, so try this, Im sure you will find it helps.

Thanks

Thankyou jammie58, I am so sorry to hear about your father I know it's hard but i guess we just have to get on with it. I lost my mum in September too and that's why i think i should have moved on by now after all this time.
Your words are very kind and do help. I guess everyone feels like this when they lose a parent as they are big part of your life, it's just nice to know your not alone.
I think about mum everyday and miss her so much i'm not sure if i do believe in god, i definately believed in life after death before mum died but now she has gone i am not so sure as i feel if there is such a thing surely i should feel her presence but i feel nothing which is really hard to understand, where has our special bond gone?
I have been thinking about going to church to try and find what im looking for but just keep thinking im being silly.
Sorry again about your dad hope your doing ok.
Thanks for replying really means a lot
Wendz x

Health

Hi wendz i lost my dad also he died of cancer 3 years on the 25th of this month and its hard to get over it i see a councillor over it but people say it takes time i had to move away from home to another city and love it jayne x

Hi wendz

I lost my Mum nearly ten years ago and I still feel like she's with me all the time, little things do pop into your head very often, but I like it now. At first it made it worse, which I suppose is how you're feeling.
I still feel sad some days, I don't think that'll ever go away, but you learn to live with it, live round it. Eventually, you will feel more 'normal' and out of the horrible nightmare stage. It took me about a year or so to learn to live with it and stôp kicking against it.
Hope that helps youxxxx

Thanks

Thanks for that sally. It is my mum that has passed away too and i guess im just starting to realize that she aint coming back and i know i just have to get on with it but am finding it soo difflicult.
It's all those little things that I took for granted and miss the most.
I just feel i can't go through 5 minutes without thinking about her and i dont want to not think about her as i am scared that i will start to forget.
It is comforting to know that there is more than me out there that feels like this and it is normal to go through this stage.
I wish i could say i felt her with me but i don't i used to really really believe in afterlife till this happened to my mum and because we had such a close bond and now nothing i really have started to question it.
Hope she is here with me would be nice to think that.

Thanks again xxxx