Pregnant but feeling like i don't want my baby
Hi, sorry I had no idea which section to post this in.
If you dont want your baby as much as you say ypu do then how come you've left it this long without doing anything? I really hope you're not just keeping the baby in hope that your ex takes you back cause that really isnt the way to go.If you dont feel that you can take care of your baby then the only option left is giving your baby up for adoption but you should think really hard about it before you come to a decision cause you might change your mind once he or she is born. You have to do what is right for you and your baby
Bless you. I think you should speak to a doctor about possible depression. Your ex isnt helping by being nasty to you (saying you're his worst relationship - what a horrible thing to say to someone - let alone a pregnant girl).
I'd say wait until you have the baby and see how you feel. Nothing can prepare you for looking into your baby's eyes for the first time. You may feel completely different. Don't beat yourself up for how you're feeling. Given the situation - it's completly natural for you to be feeling that way.
Good luck honey x
Hi . my name is patty and i am sorry you feel this way. It is probably just you dont want a commitment of taking care of a baby and believe me you shouldn't feel ashamed at all. It is ok to feel that way. It doesn't sound like depression , but it does sound like the situation is just not good right now for you to have the responsibility of taking care of a baby 24/7. I would like to talk to you more. I am getting a new phone in a week and I will give you my number. It helps having a friend to talk to. Send me a message on facebook. Here is my email address - firstname.lastname@example.org ok inbox messages only please. In the meantime honey keep your head up because things are going to get better for you. ok. Patty.
if you cant take care of it or just dont want it i would love to take it, i would take pick videos and video chat if you wanted to i love babys but i cant have any of my own i take care of my god son and neice but its not the same i have to give them back and i hate it but i love them i spoil them soo much but i think you could do it
If you would like talk you can email me at teddyvillareal@ yahoo . com
hi im 15 and pregnant young but you know i was with my baby father for about 8 monthes before i conseived and was together untill i hit about 30 weeks pregnant so we just split up recently im feeling the same resentment towords my baby aswell as you i dont think it is depression it is where u are missing your baby father and just hoping that he will come back that you feel resentment towords the child because he or she will always have the love from the baby father but in our case we may not, also it could be the fact that your child is most likely to have some of your baby fathers features so you may see him in your child making you miss your baby father not the main thing is to not worry about what your baby father is doing and just concentrate on you your baby and your freinds and family that a supporting you and our always there you will never forget ur baby father because he has a specail part in your life but atleast it will put it to the back of your ... .........
I just found out I am pregnant 2 days ago and I don't know what I feel exately. I love children, I worked as a nany for a year and as a kindergarten teacher for about a year too, and I loved working with children. I ALWAYS wanted children and I always thought that when I will get pregnant it will be all happyness and laughter, sunshine and rainbows. I even bought baby clothes when ever i found something I liked. BUT... when I saw that my periode was late we decided to take a test. I NEVER thought I would react like that. I always thought I will jump up and down for happiness, kiss my husband and start imagining how beautiful all will be. Instead I started to cry like i never cryed befor, I started saying "Thins can't be possible! This can't be possible! It's not true! Tell me it's not true!" My husband freezed. We have been married for 1 month, but we have been togheter for 5 years. We love each other sooooo much, he is the best man in the world, he is wonderful. We have been living togheter for years, we just did the wedding to make us feel better, but we considered ourselves as a proper married couple for years.
I thing I do not feel connected to my baby for selfish reasons. I don't have a job and we did not get to go on our honeymoon as my husband just found a better job the next week after the wedding, so we postponed it until spring. I was looking forward to it soooooo much. I LOVE traveling and we kept saying that we will make a child in 5 to 10 years time, to give us time to see the world. We are not rich at all and we live with my mother and brother. I was about to get a job (someone was going to help me as I live in Romania and if you don't have relations or bribe someone the chances to find a job in a small town are unexistent).
I feel like I hate the baby because it came now, days before I had the chance to get a good job in an office, before I could go on my honeymoon, before we could say "It's ok, let's have a baby! "..............I don't feel it inside me, I cant connect to it and I always thought that the moment a test would tell me that I am pregnant I would only think of it and not myself. ( I am so sad and i feel si guilty, and i think the baby can feel that it is not loved. My husband says he is happy if i am happy, but i want him to be happy for him and the baby not because of me. He is an amazing person.
I am most afarind about the money, the fact that I do not have a job and if I do not have a job I will not get any government support after the baby is born (this is how thing are here, if you dont have a job 1 year before you give birth you get no help).
We thought about abortion, but lke someone else said here I will never forgive myself and I feel like I could never have another baby, look in its eyes and thing that some years before i gave up his or her brother or sister! I could not look at my future child and not see the babay i murderred. Before this I always thought abortion is a horrible thing and I never agreed with it.
How did you feel in the end? What did you do? Is this something normal or am I just a horrible mother? Do trully feel better when you start feeling your child moving or the moment you hold your child?
I couldn't stop crying for 2 days, and the only thing that made me feel better was telling my mother and seeing that she is very happy. But I am afraid of telling my mother-in-law, not that she isn't nice, she is very nice, but I am afraid that she and my fathet-in-law will judge us for not waiting to have a proper house of our one, for not trying to have a beeter situation.
PLEASE HELP! I WANT TO LOVE MY CHILD!
It is funny how this old post is being dug out each year...Ladies, you do realise that this post is 4 years old and that this baby would soon be starting school by now??
Katy with Ashira 2 yrs and Matthew 7 wks
i cant say i know how you feel as me and my partner have been trying for another baby for almose 4 years and would give anything to have another baby you are incredibly lucky to go through this experience i am almost 23 years old and i was pregnant with my daughter at 17 and loved every minute of it have you spoken to your doctor how you feel maybe you could see a counciler or some one so you can make a full decision weather this is what you want or not as going through to have your baby and keep it even though its not what you want wouldnt fair on your baby good luck on anything you choose to do and if you want to talk message back x
Hi, I wish you all the best in having a baby but I am know in my 40's. I went a head and raised my daughter by my self and it was a very difficult challenge needless to say. Sometimes she thinks I am her sister. Funny ha, lol. I do have to remind her I am her mother at time more than not. But I now have 5 grandchildren that I adore and they don't know ther bio grandfather which I am glad. He never grew up. But they do abore my husband and they don't know or don't care that he is not the bio grandfather because they adore him. Thanks for your interest. D
I just found out I'm prego's and I am scheduled to get married in June. I finally had this wedding under control and then last Saturday I found out that I'm pregnant and it seems like my whole world falls apart. I do want children, but was hoping to wait till around Christmas to try and have them. Everyone thinks I did this on purpose and I feel horrible becuase I don't feel pregnant, nothing makes me happy. All I sit do is sit and cry. I feel like the worse person ever. My parents are happy, my fiance thinks it's the best thing in the world and no one sees that I'm miserable and hate this. So I understand...I'm just hoping my feelings go away.
I am currently pregnant with my 2nd child and feel completely different than i did with my daughter. when i found out i was pregnant with my daughter i was 17 and terrified single mom didnt think i had anything going for me and was feeling bad about everything. during my pregnancy i started bleeding and realised then i wanted my baby and didnt want anything bad to happen to her. now i know she is the best thing in my life and i know she understands why i wasnt happy to begin with. when she was 10month old i met a fantastic bloke who i am having a new baby with he treats my daughter like his own and they loves each other so much. this baby was planned and we are all so excited about it. there are other ways for your child to see their father without you having to see him eventually you will be strong enough to see him. i think personally you need to speak to your midwife about how your feeling towards the baby. if you decide you do not want the baby there are plenty of people out there who would love a baby but cant have them. decide whats best for you and your baby good luck xx
Sweetie its ok. but you are lucky to be pregnant. As for me, I was born without a uterus so i am not able to have children at all. If you dont want the child, i would be glad to care for it.
im feeling the same hun at the moment but im in a relationship and ive got four others at home.im pregnant with my 5th and realy not as positive with this than i have been with any of my others. just dont feel like its the best thing for me and my family...im o confused aswell hun.xx your not silly to be feeling like this your goin to be scared and get upset at times but if you can think to your self this is my baby and i will cope on my own then you and your baby will be fine.x. woman are very strong people and nothing can break us as long as you think positive.xx.
hi no u sent this message nrly a yr ago now but when i read im in the same situation as you were and love to hear how ur coping ive4 children and im also expecting my 5th and absolutly terified on how im going to cope ivegot my partner he says its going to be okey but he be working so im on my own really during the day would love if you could reply please thanks, my email is email@example.com xxx
half of what you feel can be your body changing and your hormoans but from what you ex has said i would really think about what your doing because you have a baby to become a family an its much harder on your own i have friends as single mums an they say its so hard im a bit in the same situation as you i have just found out im 7 weeks pregnant which is ok i still have time but my boyfriend is a prick! sorry for my language but he is but if your having second forts maybe its just not ment to be have you spoken to your midwife about it? cause that can really help. and think whats right for your child and yourself before you ex because men never put us first so never put him first. either way you will be ok and probs make the bestest mum ever! hope this helped x
im 19 and going through the kind of same thing ....
i was really happy to begin with and me and my partner was exited ....i went for my 20 weeks scan and found out i am having a girl...my partner was gutted and i felt so bad and hated everything ...what hurt the most is that he didnt even give me a hug or say anything to me after the scan.
we argued that nite about it he said sorry and things but i was not convinced...i looked on his phone a few days after and he was texting his mate about how he was at the scan and laughing about it...that really upset me and i asked him why he tought it was funny how he hurt my feelings and he said he was not being funny it didnt mean anything .....
we have been arging over stupid little things and i cant stand it ....we split up and get back together but this time its for good ...i told him yesterday how id been feeling and about not wanting the baby and he just said im crazy and took all the baby things we got ....i know its bad to feel like this and its so hard to talk to any one and i cant talk to him about it because he just thinks im losing it !x
I was 14 yrs when I got pregnent and during the dilivery I was alone just me and the doctor. When my daughter was born the doctor said you have a beautiful girl. Later that evening my boyfriend, the daddy, said to me. When I heard the doctor say it was a girl he thought shove it back up. I could never put into words the hurt that tore at my heart. Then he would always tell me he wanted to have a boy. ... I didn't sleep with him again for a year. But he wound up having another baby girl by someone else and there was about 6 months different in age. He finally married and had two sons. Then they divorce and he remarried and had another son. Son he got his sons and I raised our daughter by myself. Boys/Men! But I have found a wonderful man that I married and I heard his 2nd marriage is on the rocks. So I hope those words burn in his ears every night. D
Every woman goes through so very many emotions about being pregnant and having a baby and every single one of those emotions is totally normal!! As an individual you are entitled to be different and have different wants and that may not include a baby!! No one who does not want a child should feel wrong for feeling that way however--here is where the BUT comes in!! The choice we make once it's too late and were pregnant and a life is growing inside us does NOT affect just us- Terminating a pregnancy is a touchy subject for most people-myself included-I personally feel that anyone considering abortion should do a very fair amount of research about the whole process and if after truly knowing what it includes maybe it would change your mind on your real options. I have done this research and was shocked at the reality of what is done and cannot be undone. When you consider that a premature baby can be born at 22 weeks and live do you consider it a baby with feelings? Is it only a baby with real feelings because it's now outside of your body? Now when I say feelings do not misunderstand I don't mean emotional I mean physical. At what point do we actually say it's too late and although I do not want a baby I will find a family who does and this situation although not ideal can have an outcome that doesn't make me question if I should be considered a murderer?.
Please understand that I am not judging or trying to make anyone feel bad I am simply being truthful to the facts that once learned CANNOT ever be ignored or forgotten. I spent more time finding out about this topic than most people would be able to stomach knowing and seeing. I know the reality of abortions to be a brutal and horrific injustice to lives of babies who's voices cannot be heard simply because they are not given the chance to be. I have a problem with the methods of abortion and the fact that no consideration for the fetus's pain is ever taken into consideration. Please Please if abortion is ever something you would consider RESEARCH!!! Find out the facts-the real facts of what, why, and how, and see if it's still an option for you.
I am 12 weeks pregnant, I have been up and down like a yo-yo. I fell pregnant last year on the pill, and despite changing the type of pill the same has occurred quite unexpectedly over the Summer. I can't explain how resentful I am feeling about this baby, yet I know that if I abort I will never forgive myself or allow myself to have a family. My partner and I are still together, but I know as he is slighly older and not at University like me that all he wanted was a child. I think I am scared of losing him if I decide I can't go through with this pregnancy. His family seem to be telling everyone and I am not even sure the baby is ok. I am having no feelings of excitement about this child- I know what I am losing and possibly what I will lose forever. I think possibly this has something to do with guilt from the abortion last year... which was never helped by the comments from my partner which I really took to heart. I just don't know what to do with myself... my law degree and career look just like a dream. As for my part-time job, I think telling my employers is going to make things awful. Maybe I am selfish but my partner does not earn enough to support a child if I lose my work.