hi
This is my first pregnancy and I am just over 5 months pregnant. I just wondered if anyone else has had the feeling of insecurity. I am in a long term loving relationship and although the baby wasn't planned we are over-joyed. But I cant seem to shake this feeling that my partner doesn't really love me. I know he does very much.
Do you think its more to do with my body changing so much thats causing it (been insecure with myself). please respond i would like to know if other pregnant woman feel this way sometimes

Thanks

Hi,

I felt very insecure during my first pregnancy and we weren't too long together when we discovered we were pregnant and I felt at the time that was why I was insecure. The insecuity left me after I had my daughter and we like all relationships have had our ups and downs but we are even closer. I am currently 5 months pregnant on my second and the insecurity has returned. Eventhough this time round I know he loves me but the insecurity creeps up on me every now and then especially when I'm feeling sick, down, far from sexy and I feel he should be more sympathic. Also we don't make love as much as he would like too, so I think it normal to feel insecure, I've just learned not to dwell on it too much and do something nice for him to let him know you love him. I'm heading off on a girly weekend with my girlfriends and he surprised me with his insecurity eventhough I'm pregnant, which made me feel great. I think men feel insecure and when you love someone it's natural, just don't show it all the time.

Good luck.

I have been feeling like this to. I'm only 7 weeks gone but my skin has gone really bad and cos I feel so ill I can't be bothered to make the effort so I don't wear any make up. I'm scared that when I have the baby my partner won't look at me in the same way anymore. He'll look at me like a mother not like his partner does anyone else feel like that?

actually, but not because of my partner, because of me. I know that he loves me but we are from 2 different cultures, he is very down to hearth, not sympathetic at all, and doesn't really care about things who are very important for me. Example, we have a spare room with a double bed. I would like to make this room for the baby, buying all the furniture and redecorate it, keeping the doublemattress in our room, under our bed ready for the guest.
Or my boyfriend think that it is not necessary, he would like to keep the room as it is. No need to buy any furniture cause the baby can sleep in our room, i can change him on our bed and that's it!

We can't speak really about my pregnancy because we haven't got the same point of view, about that and about the health system here in London and he gets upset so quickly and is so stuborn that it cuts the conversation right down.
I really wonder if he is the right person i really would like to share all my life with. I thought he was and love him, but with this pregnancy, i am feeling very different and alone.
Maybe everything will be ok and it is just a bad period. I am happy to be pregnant but not as much happy as i was expecting to be.

Good luck!

i understand your feeling but please try not to worry too much about it. it must be very difficult been so different from each other. it could just be his way of doing things it doesn't have anything to do with the way he feels about you. he needs to compromise with you, dont think you have to change all your views just because there not his. you have a say too!

Thankyou for reply to my message it has really helped to know other people feel this way too.

I felt the same, I think it's because you've got hormones flying round all over the place and you're dealing with huge physical changes. Nine months seems like ages, but it's actually such a short time to get used to something so big.
have you spoken to your partner about it? Just calm down and let your rational mind believe him. explain to him about the hormones and stuff, even though he's probably already giving you the benefit of doubt anyway, they can sometimes be more undertsanding than we think!
let me know how you're feelingxxxx