Im a student in north wales and am from northumberland (near newcastle). Ive not been home since i discoverd i was pregnant (im now 7/8 weeks) or since i told my mum but am planning to go home next week for a few day as its my brother and sisters birthday! Im petrified of going home because i know mum will go on and on at me. This is how she has been so far...

My origional plan was to have a termination but the more my boobs hurt and the more i was going to the hospital and having scans (they suspected and eptopic) the more i realised that i was worried for the baby and had feelings for it already so i canceled my appointment with BPAS.

I told mum i wasnt able to get rid of the baby and she said well its ur life but im not going to hate you and you have to tell grandma urself. I was really happy as it seemed taht she was listening to what i wanted for once! then the next day she rang me and said that the more she thought about it the stupider my decision was and that grandma would be really dissopointed as im throwing my degree away and would be no better than all the girls who i went to school with which had kids young and have no qualifications. She also said that id have to sit there at christmas and new year (my birthday) and know that everyone was thinking that im stupid. She said i would have a hell of a 21st if i keep the baby.

i told her that there is no way i am getting rid and her solution to that is for me to stop being sentemental!

i then tell her how steve (my partner) is happy about it! and she says that he is probs only saying that to keep me and that if i finnish my degree (like im going to do) then he will get sick of keeping me and walk out.

then said that i am staying here because the university is fine about it and wants me to keep going with my degree so i dont have to take a year out unless i have complications....in there words

I'm 16 and i kept my baby,i'm 40weeks+1day now. So i'm overdue.
Families can be harsh at first, especially because i was supposed to be the brains ou of me and my sister. (She has 2 kids,2 and 3, she's 22.)
My nanny said she'd give me 500pound to abort my baby boy, and she carried on like that until i was 23weeks pregnant! My son's life is worth so much more than that.
My bf nearly left me. My dad didn't even send me a text on my 16th birthday. My mum kept begging me to not have him.
Now things are a bit better, but i know when my baby get here, everyone will change. I want to make something of myself too.
Good luck xx

Hi hun, I really feel for you as I know how much you need the support of your family at this time, we all do. I'm sure it's just a lot for your mum to take in, and maybe what she said about your Gran was just a bit of a kneejerk reaction and she'll regret it later, although saying what she did about your birthday was hurtful I imagine? I think you're really brave to stay at uni, but if you know you can do both then go for it, if your bf is going to be there for you that's great, and your mum has seven months to get used to the idea. I'm sure if your gran loves you she will be happy, even if she does not show it at first. Try not to let it get you down, and well done for being strong, just make sure you have people around you like bf/ good uni mates who will be there for you.

Keep us posted on how you are getting on,

Em x

Aw hun, take no notice. It is probably just a shock for you mum but i am sure once she sees your little baby everything will change.

I didnt have the same situation with my mum (she was over the moon) but i did with my mother in law! she was convinced i forced her son into it and even told other family members that my baby was a mistake! I was sooo upset with her but i kept my chin up, its hard as the thing you want most through your pregnancy is the family there to give you support. Now I have had my son my mother in law couldnt be more involved and she is constantly buying him stuff and fussing over him. My son is not her first granchild, my partners brother has to girls.

I spent my 21st pregnant and to me it was the best 21st birthday present i ever could have had - knowing that I was going to be a mum was the best feeling in the world!

Dont worry about negativity from others and just think about your lovely little baby! they are very hard work and labour is painful but they are worth every second of it ALL! it is such an experience

If you need to let off steam please feel free to private message me for a chat!

Claire x

im not from this forum im from the ttc but when i read your post i just wanted to reply. Im sure your mom will change the way she sees things in a few months time when your bump starts to show and she realises that your carrying her grandchild. I think youve made the right choice to keep your baby if thats what you want. Im sure you can finish your degree (loads of other people do it) Having a baby doesnt stop you from having a life it just makes your life more full.
My cousin was pregnant on her 18th and 21st birthdays so shes just made up for it since shes 27 now lol
anyway just want to say good luck with your pregnancy
send some baby dust my way
kerry
xxxx

in the words of the uni " she will just be pregnant not ill". They have also got plans for me for if i do get ill or go into labour and am not able to sit the exams when im ment to! They have been fantastic. I told mum all this and that steve is comming here to be with me as soon as he finds a new job so he can keep the money comming so he can save...she said that he could just be saying that.

Im sure this is making me more ill and tired than the preganncy itself is making me. I feel utterly miserable and down and am now worrying that the stress has or will affect the baby...what if the stress has stoped it developing as it should!

I just needed a good moan so thankyou for reading this really really long post!
any advice would be great too!