bit of adviice needed. A relative ( by marrage) has just had a still birth at full term. Now I don't know them that well but had and have an afenity with them as our babies were due 6 weeks apart.

I know most horrible thing you can think of happening!

So would sending a card offer any comfort? Would seeing a card from us remind them that other people are still having babies etc??

i lost a baby last year n was sent lots of cards from friends n relatives, its nice to know people are thinkin of you
Lisa x

It is a very difficult and awkward situation for both of you. In my home town a similar thing happened to a neighbour of ours about 6 years ago. No one knew what to do but someone asked her family if they wanted visitors and they said yes so over the next few weeks family/friends/neighbours called to their house to offer their condolences and brought flowers (for the mother) and/or cards offering sympathy. Apparently they were very much touched and over whelmed by everyone's kindness and said it helped them with their loss and grief.

My sister had a baby around the same time - she doesn't live at home any more but when she next went home to visit for a few days (which would have been 2 or 3 months later) she didn't know what to do for the best and she didn't want to just bump into her somewhere with the baby so she thought she'd just get it over and done with so left her baby at home and went to visit the neighbour. She was glad she did because the neighbour was asking her all about her baby etc. and said she should have brought him along although my sister explained the reason why she didn't.

Hope this helps.

Anna (21+3)

Hi

I personally would send a card but not a with sympathy or condolance card. Why not get a blank card and write something like 'thinking of you' in it? I think that's what I would do.

Donna, x

hey yeh its a bit tricky isnt it.because you dont want to upset anyone..
but i think that sending them a card would be nice..
it depends what kind of people they are...you know them better than any of us but i would if i was in your situation
good luck