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Thread started by:
"Help trying for a baby after a miscarriage"
Posted by b100 3 June  at  12:57

Hi everyone

I really wanted to have a child last summer, I got married in september and on our honeymoon we thought we will try! amazingly two weeks later I came back from my holidays to find out I was pregnant, everything was going well until I started to spot it was brown it gradually went worse to blood so I rushed to a private hospital they gave me a scan and I saw my little baby it had a heartbeat and I was told everything looked fine,I was 6wks and 4days pregnant, there is no need to worry I was not going to miscarry. Five days later I bleed even more, I knew something was wrong so the next day I went for a scan and was told there is no heartbeat, I was a missed miscarriage and there was no reason why it happened. I was devastated and didnot know what to think, I just felt horrible inside and felt I let everyone down, I know its not my fault but u cant help feeling like its your fault.

I did many blood tests etc and the doctors said there is nothing wrong with you, after your next period try again. We waited 2 cycles, Jan 2005 we started to try and since then no luck, I am beside my self why its not happening, I tried ovulation tests and its not showing any ovulation at all, my cycle is very irregular too, so obviously its very hard to know when to try. My hubby is great about the whole thing but I just cant stop crying every few days keep thinking about it.

I just wanted to know if anyone can give me some ideas how to pin point my ovulation and any thoughts on helping to conceive quickly.

I hope to god no one has to go through the pain I went through.
 
Replies:
 
Messages:
"Same as me"
Posted by saucysassy 3 July at 22:28

Im so sorry to hear about that, I was pregnant in january this year, i got married in march and exactly a week later i had a miscarriage, so not a great honeymoon period. We decided to wait 2 months as well, but i got pregnant after about 1-2months. Now though ive had spotting which has become bright red blood so im expecting the worse, only this time my hubby is miles away and its not easy. This will be the 3rd baby ive lost if things dont work out. You didnt do anything, everyone says its nature but ofcourse you dont feel that way when it goes wrong you think of everything you couldve done right, its natural. I felt the same way. Then i think of smack addicts i know who carry baby full term and even comes out healthy compared to a clean living person who cant get pregnant, or does and then loses the baby. There really is nothing you can do but keep on trying and hoping that it will be your turn. Its not easy to do, even as i say this im here thinking the worse that i know this is going to end in another m/c and my hubbys on the other end of the fone shouting at me to be more positive. Its not easy but we have to try. Good luck
"Help"
Posted by suzig79 23 June at 18:03

HI EVERYONE MY HUSBAND AND I GOT MARRIED APRIL 07 AND WERE DELIGHTED TO LEARN AFTER ONLY 2 MONTHS OF TRYING WERE PREGNANT IN JANUARY 08.I MISCARRIED AT 11 WEEKS AND WERE BOTH DEVASTATED AS IT SEEMS EVERYONE AROUND US WERE FALLING PREGNANT WITHOUT TRYING WHY DID THIS HAPPEN TO US.MY HUSBAND IS GREAT AND IF POSSIBLE THIS HAD MADE US STRONGER AND MORE DETERMINED TO TRY AGAIN AND SUCCEED,HOWEVER AFTER THE D AND C MY PERIODS ARE TOTALLY IRREGULAR AND MY OVULATION KIT IS SHOWING NO OVULATING???WHAT DOES THIS MEAN? MY CYCLE HAS WENT FROM 28 DAYS TO 38 DAYS AND I AM SO FED UP AND FRUSTATED.
SO LIKE YOU I HAVE BEEN TOLD BY THE DOCTORS IT WAS A NORMAL MISCARRIAGE AND ALL BLOOD TEST ARE FINE SO LIKE YOU I WOULD LOVE TO KNOW WHY THIS ISNT HAPPENING????? IM HEALTHY AND HAVE A HUGE SUPPLY OF FOLIC ACID WHICH I TAKE RELIGIOUSLY SO WHY NOT PREGNANT.....AAGGGGGGRRRRRRRRRHHH
ANYONE OUT THERE GOT ANY IDEAS IF MY CYCLE WILL EVER GO BACK TO 28 DAYS AND ANY IDEAS WHEN IM OVULATING?

I HOPE EVERYONE IS WELL
"I have been there and hope i can help."
Posted by baby2006girl 17 June at 05:50

I recently had a D & E procedure on May 29 and I was 7 weeks. Unfortunately, there was never a baby. It does make the mourning easier though. Well, that was my 4th pregnancy.

I have had problems conceiving. My period comes within every 32 to 52 days. With my third child, I sought help from the internet and found different positions to try to conceive. I would put a pillow below my back, but just above my butt. Propping myself upside down from 45 min. to an hour every time my husband and I had intercourse. In about two months or less I was pregnant. I would calculate my periods to estimate when I would ovulate. The internet ovulation calendars helped a lot. I would put the earliest date and then do another with the latest to know when about to conceive.

I hope this brings you help with your next try. I love being a mom and I know the feeling you are having. My husband and I want another child. He has two from a previous marriage, I have two from my previous relationship, and we have our daughter together. We want another to fulfill our family.

Good Luck! Have fun trying and don't regret anything. You should be in the right state of mind. Stress never helps. Trust me I know.
"Dont worrie"
Posted by rage187 14 June at 20:52

I Went through the same thing as you but only i was 19 weeks pregnant. I started bleeding, went to the hospital they gave me a scan and listened for a heart beat, eveything was fine. they sent me home the next day i started to bleed more but i had cramping pains and they got closer and closer (i was in labour) called an ambulance got to hospital gave birth to a baby boy who died more or less straight away. That was November 2007 its now june 2008 and i still aint pregnant dont know why i've been trying very month. So dont worrie girl i know wat your goin through and i've only now just got over it it took time but im ok now.
"You are not alone"
Posted by shweta345 28 April at 16:12

hi there, my name is Shweta and I am from India......read your experience; I know what you are going through and i know it is not at all easy but I must tell you that you are a brave girl and soon you will be over it , just stand strong and never think any thing negative on the basis of what happened with you.
All I can say is that, may be that was not the right time for you and your little one.
I had two miscarriages last year, even I breakdown and cry sometimes but trust me that doesn't help.......we need to be strong and positive so that we can get a new life on this earth, Godbless and all the very best......keep smiling love.
"I know how you feel"
Posted by meg07091 22 April at 19:14

I just wanted to drop you a line so you know your not alone.

I had a miscarriage on christmas eve and have been having trouble conceiving ever since. I'm feeling very low as I'm now at the stage where I'm really unhappy.

I am 33 and due to health complications, irregular periods it took 1 year to get as far as falling pregnant the first time, so I'm now feeling I left it too late.

Like you I am very lucky as I have great support but I suppose it effects me like this as my dad has been diagnosed with terminal lung cancer and been predicted 1 year. So all I want is to have a little one before I loss him.

I too hope no one else has to go through what we have and I hope that one day it will be turn.

x
"Need to talk"
Posted by samanthav123 16 March at 17:44

hello my name is samantha verrall i am so sorry to here what you wnt thorw i went throw the same thing i found out i was 6 weeks and 5day pregnant and i was just about to go out for dinner with my partner and i was losing a little blood so i went to hosptal and had a early pregnacy scan they said to me that it is nothing to wory about it is because my body is use to no coming on? and it had a hartbeet as well it was so lovely to hear some think like that i was so happy that i was going to have a baby i have trying for a very long time and then i went home and 4 days later i was losing lots off blood i had to get a ambulence out and then took me to the hosital and they could not tell me if i was having a miss caridge till the next day then they come in and told me that there was nothing they could do i have lost my baby i was so up set all i was thinking about that it was my folt and every one was telling me it was not but that all was going throw my head that it was it was on the 21 december last year i lost my baby i still cry every nite now and i have been trying for another baby now but is not happerning i do test after tests to tell me when to start trying and is coming up with nothing if you need to talk about any think i am here i no i mite be 18 yeas old but i have lost 2 babys now i am here for any one that needs to talk ok ? and sorry about the spelling thanks for lissoning to me?
"Dont despair"
Posted by mshenton 27 January at 13:45

Just wanted to say that all is not lost - since 1999 I have sufferred 8 miscarriages and as yet doctors are unable to diagnose why. Suggestions include blood disorders and scar tissue on my womb all as yet unconfirmed.... I thought i would never have a baby but to my suprise in march 2006 I found out i was pregnant again.... didn't raise my hopes as I thought the outcome wouldbe the same as the others but my joshua held on even through a fall down some stairs as well as my mini stroke at 34 weeks!!!I was in labour for 22 and a half hours and it ended in a c section as his heart was deteriorating but my boy held strong and he is now 1 year old!!! He is the best thing to happen to me and my partner and he is our special little miracle so don't despair hopefully you will be successful too just don't blame yourself some things are out of our control and we just need to keep wishing for miracles to happen sometimes!!!
"Hi!"
Posted by jasmeet1 11 December at 23:41

Hello!

sorry to hear about ur miscarrige.i know the pain ur going through.ur not alone my friend even i am also going through this horrible pain.i had a miscarrige 2 weeks ago.i was alos 6 weeks 4 days pregnant and suddenly started to spot and gradually went worse.i am so upset.this was my first baby.i cant stop thinking about it like you.Even though my husband is always support me but i dont know i feel so alone sometimes.

All my blood reports are normal,evrything okay but i dont know what to do.well,i want to try for another one after 1 or 2 periods.i want to tell u ur not alone.like u my periods are irreular as well.try to speak to ur doctor,ask him/her to do ur ovulation test.so,u can come to know that ur ovulating regularly.

email me whenever u want.we can be friends to help each other.
God bless u!
"Pain of miscarriage!!"
Posted by maz80 23 November at 12:00

Hi,
Just to let you know you are not alone. I got married on the 11th August 2007 and on the 13th August (2 days later)we found out we were pregnant after 4 and 1/2 years of trying. To say we were exstatic was an understatement. Then on the 15th August I started bleeding I went straight to the doctors who told me I was 6 weeks and 4 days and then sent me for an ultrasound there was no heartbeat our baby had gone.
The problem was I didnt feel any different I still felt pregnant there was only a little bit of blood and no cramps so how gad this happened?
I had blood tests every two days for the next two weeks so we couldnt have a honeymoon. No explanation no nothing just one of those things the hospital said and all I kept thinking was I shouldnt have had that drink on our wedding day, maybe if I hadnt of danced so much I would still be pregnant!
We didnt tell many people we were pregnant because we didnt have time so no-one really knows that we have miscarried and a friend of mine must of gotten pregnant around the same time and she didnt know that I was as well. So now she brings me scan pictures and tells me she feels sick and is tired. Theres me thinking I would give anything to feel like that.
Its just over 3 months since it happened and I still cant look at our wedding photos without a tear coming to my eye.
Regarding ovulation I have no idea I try to do it every couple of days if I can.
I hope this helps as I dont know anyone who has been through this and it would be good to talk to someone who knows what Im on about. My husband has been great about it all but he doesnt understand exactly how im feeling.
""time is a healer""
Posted by daisy855 24 January at 14:50

Hi,
I fully understand what you are going through. I had been trying for a baby for 18 months when I found out I was pregnant. I only found out as I thought I was having erratic periods. Within a week of finding out, I lost my baby and had to cancel my holiday (June 07). It felt like my world had fallen apart, seeing my baby on the ultrasound and then loosing it in such a short space. Was it my fault, had I exercised to hard etc etc. I try to tell my self it is natures way of saying I'm not perfect mummy. I then went on to have another miscarriage in Aug 07.
Since then, I had patiently waited until Now (Beg of Jan) to try again. Easier said than done when you wake up thinking about having a baby all the time, friends and family are having babies. (I cried when my sister in law gave birth to her daughter beg Dec)
I look at life now and try to stay as positive as possible and think my time will come soon when my body is ready, I'm a strong person, I have just changed jobs to get rid of any stresses and am looking forward to the coming months of trying for another baby.
Stay strong, cry when you need to but look at life with happiness, your wedding was a special day, make it stay special and look to the future for more special times and just keep on trying. Your husband probably understands, as mine does, but they do not express themselves as much as us girls.

"Think positive"
Posted by hazelharrington76 7 November at 13:20

i know what your going through.my baby girl was born at 23wks and 5 days and died 40 minutes later.that was only in august.we are trying for another one,but it took us 2years.keep me posted!good luck.x
"I no how u feel "
Posted by hans1982 13 May at 23:17

hi there and i no from experiance just hw hard all this is, i got preggers after four years and a lot of test and treatment, only to find out that at 7 weeks pregenat that i had suffered a missed misscarige, it was and felt like the end of the world and no matter how much i was told it felt that i had let not only my self down but everyone else down to, but i have now kept postivie and we are trying again, i was lucky in the fact that i have ovlauted after my mc but i really do think that u should go and get checked to see if there is anything that can be done,
and above all keep postive

linda xxx
"You are not alone!"
Posted by mmtk3 6 April at 04:35

Hi. I am sorry about your m/c. I have one child but I have been there twice before. (after my son was born) It may not make you feel better but 33% of women m/c.

My journey started when I noticed a change in my ovulation after ttc a few months after my first miscarriage(mc at 7 wks). I contacted my ob and that started the process. I started on clomid and when that didn't work, I had a hsg test done(I think it is hsg- they put a die in you to see if your tubes are blocked) The test came out fine but I still had probs. After about 6 months, I went to a fertility specialist. I was diagnosed with PCOS(polycistic ovarian syndrome-cysts on my ovaries) which made it difficult to conceive. I was put on meds and eventually started on fertility shots along with intrauterine insemination.(insemination with my hubbys "stuff") I finally got pg after about 9-10 months with the specialist. Unfortunately, the pg didn't take and I had a dnc at 7 1/2 weeks. We waited a few months and continued trying with the help of a specialist. We have been trying on and off for about 2 years since the last mc. The whole process has taken about 3 1/2 years but I am happy to report that we are 11 wks pg with child #2.

I know how you are feeling because I have been there. (It was really frustrating because I had unexplained infertility. The pcos made it difficult but it wasn't the reason for my infertility)It has definitely been a roller coaster ride, but my hubby has been great! He has been very supportive and encouraging. (especially when I was ready to give up) It sounds like yours is the same way.

If you feel like something isn't right, call your ob. BE PROACTIVE! Only you know your body. I knew someting wasn't right with my ovulation so I called my ob. It has been a long journey but we didn't give up and now we are going to start a new one.(almost 8 yrs after my son was born- yikes!) Good luck on your journey!
"Have you had any fertility tests done?"
Posted by fringegirl 20 March at 22:16

I ask because I had very irregular periods after I came off the pill and they are still very irregular. I had any x-ray and one of my tubes is blocked and I was told I eas not ovulating.
Despite all this I got pregnant in February but sadly lost the baby at 5 weeks which was devastating.
My doctor thinks that I may be ovulating evey other month.
I too did loads of ovulation testing and never got a positive result.
I am 42 so am now going privately to get fertility treatment.
Do go to your doctors and request tests etc. If you are younger than me you will get treatment on the NHS. You may well be ovulating but not very often - I strongly advise seeking help and having tests done.
Hope this helps and good luck.
"Same thing here...."
Posted by t2lark21 11 March at 05:45

The only difference in your story and mine, I got married August 2, 2003 and I miscarried on Sept. 27th, 2003. I still haven't had a child and we have been trying the same things and nothing is wrong with either one of us. I did come up pregnant a few months ago and ended up having another miscarriage. The doctor don't understand it and neither do I. Today even start thinking about it and started crying because I see woman that don't deserve a child or don't won't one and they end up with a child. But I began to pray everyday, just so I could have a peace about. The doctor did tell me that if you are a person that worry alot it will sometimes cause a miscarriage and it is hard not to worry when you are trying so hard. I know that God will bless me with a child; but it is in his hands. If you sit down and think about the life you would give the child; would it be one that would please God in all aspects. But all you energy and focus on God and I promise you, you will get a peace about it and you will see things change for the better. I had to realize that God never put more on you than you can bear and if he didn't think you could handle it he won't have allowed you to be able to come out of it. So trust God and he will make sure you get 2, 3, 4, or even 5 children and you will be the parent God want you to be; but make sure you have put God first in your life and that is exactly what I am doing right now. I getting myself ready for my children, so I can be a good example and role model for them. Be Blessed!! I pray for you and you pray for me!
"Words of inspiration..."
Posted by danykva 13 March at 00:42

t2lark21, you couldnt have put that in better words. i also experienced a miscarriage. 3 all together. I had one in November 2003, November 2005, and just miscarried on March 7,2007 and still experiencing the aftermath of that one. I believe in God and pray everyday. I did have a hard time excepting this miscarriage because like i said it was my THIRD but yet the Dr. is telling me there is nothing wrong with me or my husband. It gets harder every time but like u said I will keep praying and putting my trust and faith in God and I know one day soon he will bless me with a child. God said if you put your faith in him he will give you ALL the desires of your heart, you just wait and see. Even though you may not see it God has a reason for EVERYTHING. May God Bless everyone through these trying times and remember everything is not on your time it's on God's time. Please pray for me and i will pray for all!!
"Wondering"
Posted by maggiemae2 18 December at 19:46

I just had my third miscarraige and came upon your note. Just wondering what ever happened to you. Hope all is well.
"Miscarriage"
Posted by candytaouk 10 March at 03:58

HELLO i also had a miscarriage at 6 weeks and 4 days i had a scan and they said everything ok then 5 days later i was in hospital having woken up in a pool of blood in my bed.
it was the most devastating experience of my entire life. i too want another baby and have tryed ovulation tests and am wondering if you had any luck?
"Think ive miscarried but the sac is still there"
Posted by lml28 4 April at 19:14

hi, i wonder if anyone has had the same as me, i feel a bit confused!
last monday started having some bleeding only light pink colour when i wiped myself, then a bit later it was a bit more like discharge with some blood in it and had a dull pain in my stomach.
i went to hospital on the tuesday for a scan which they said the sac was still there but they couldnt see anything inside so they booked me in for a rescan for 2 weeks later, then last night(tuesday) i went to the toilet and passed quite a bit of blood and a clot about the size of a fifty pence coin, went back to hospital where the doctor examined me and said the neck of the womb was open so just had to let nature take its course as i was miscarrying, went back for a scan today and was told the sac was still there but still couldnt see anything inside.
i am 7 weeks pregnant.
im still passing a lot of blood and the pain is like early stages of labour but not sure if ive lost a twin and still got 1 inside or if i still havent miscarried fully. the doctor said that id passed tissue but the midwife today said i couldnt have as the sac is intact. should they be able to see something in the sac at this stage of pregnancy? please help because im a bit confused!




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