Overweight and trying to conceive:thoughts and experiences

Hi!
I hope nobody minds me posting this link?

I am doing some research about the thoughts and experiences of women who are overweight and infertile. I would really like to hear from people.
You can find more information about the research and about me on the website. You can also contact me if you want to know more.

http://www.overweight-infertility.co. uk

If you are comfortable sharing, it would be great if you could leave your messages ON THE SITE ITSELF as well/or instead of here so that others can also read the posts.
I look forward to hearing from you, Many thanks,

Petra

Things I'd like to hear about:

* Your best and worst experiences so far.
* How you have been treated by staff.
* Do you think weight is an issue when trying to conceive or having infertility treatment?
* Overweight women's right to conceive.
* Are some doctors better than others & why?
* Do you always agree with your doctors/staff?
* Have you been affected by policies that restrict certain treatments to overweight women?
* Have you accepted them or tried to find a way around them?
* And many more...

Having a baby while overweight doesn't have to be difficult...

There are huge assumptions made about being overweight and "therefore" infertile. I got pregnant within 6 weeks at the age of 37 despite having a BMI of nearly 40. I went on to deliver a 9lb 2 oz baby, but I suspect much of the weight was put on in the 16 days past my due date I had to wait before being induced. Fat doesn't mean unfit - my blood pressure is good, my cholesterol levels are good... my pregnancy was uneventful apart from indigestion in the last 3 weeks.

I actually benefited from being overweight when I was pregnant - I was sent to see a consultant anesthetist in case I needed anesthetic intervention during the birth. I meant I could ask all sorts of questions (very useful!). The only slight down-side was one midwife who was quite negative and assumed I'd have a difficult birth. In fact, it was great, and I was home 15 hours later. On the whole, doctors have been more dogmatic; midwives more flexible and realistic. And female doctors have been just as bad as male ones, often worse. Doctors do so like their little charts, while what you actually need is someone who can see the individual...

Having said all that, I DO think weight is often an issue in problems conceiving (whether one is underweight or overweight). I know several overweight women who have thus far failed to conceive, and only one slim woman who has. And all available evidence does point to fertility problems when a woman doesn't have a "normal" BMI.

Finally, I don't think any woman (overweight or otherwise) has the "right" to conceive. We have the right to get some support from the NHS, and to get advice, but infertility is not life-threatening, no matter how emotionally painful, and we need to draw an unpopular line somewhere if we don't want the NHS to be completely overwhelmed. I appreciate I am laying myself open to abuse and misunderstanding saying this, but I think you need to look at the whole story...

I am overweight.

I have four children even though I am morbidly obese and was throughout all my pregnancies. So, no fertility problems. Worst experience, pubis symphysis dysfunction with 2... nothing to do with weight, it is caused by pregnancy hormones softening the ligaments in the pelvis and can effect all women, not just overweight women.

I was treated like dirt by only one doctor during my fourth pregnancy. He was rude and presumed I would have all kinds of problems despite 3 previous fine pregnancies, just because I was overweight and despite having 3 previous average size babies, 6lb 12 oz, 7lb 5oz, 7lb 1oz, he had decided I would have a massive baby and needed glucose tests and all sorts. I was very angry about this and feel the doctor was a fattist idiot!

No I do not think it is an issue when trying to conceive or having fertility, overweight women are no more or less likely to have problems than anyone else.

I do not think anyone has the right to deny overweight women the right to have a child. It is discrimination of the worst kind. Being everweight does not make a women any less of a good mother or any more likely to have complications than anyone else. In fact being underweight, smoking and drinking are bigger problems in my opinion.

Yes some doctor are better than others, as I have mentioned previously. It is the younger doctors who are the worst for being judgemental idiots.

No, I have not always agreed with doctors, as they have no proof for what they are saying. I was fine and I was judged by fabricated statistics. Everyone is different and everyone's pregnancy is different regardless of size.

No, I have not as yet been effected by policies that effect treatment for overweight women, but if I was I would argue in court that this is discrimnation and is against my human rights to receive treatment that I pay for through my national insurance and taxes. I am as entitled to treatment as anorexics, smokers, drug addicts and drinkers for example, are. I should not be treated as a third class citizen just because I am overweight.

I think that being overweight is becoming the norm for most people these days and it is not because they stuff their faces all day, as is always made out, or because of lack of excersize. I am proof of this... I have 4 children who are all of an average weight for their age, and we do things as a family, go out walking, take our dogs, etc... I do lots of volunteer work all week and am on my feet a lot, we eat meals as a family, so I do not eat any more that anyone else, yet, despite all this I am still overweight. I am hurt when I am judged by media portrayals of overweight people as lazy, fat good for nothings who do nothing and eat all day. It is about time the media shut up and the government stop making so much out of weight issues. It is about time they gave more funding into studying why active, average women and men like me are gaining weight, despite our efforts to stay slim.

It is about time being judgemental was stopped, because this is what is leading the world the down the path it's going... as in the 2 goths getting beat up and killed for what they wore. More and more people are being expected to fit into one image of a human, a skinny, fashion conscious, beautiful model person, with all trace of individuality stripped away into this perfect image... Hitlar wanted this, his perfect arian society, is this where we are heading again, with even genetics looking into finding and eliminating the fat gene, or the disability gene or the brown eye gene, or the hair colour gene.... how far will it go???

I agree

Hello there,

I would just like to say that i totally agree with you, I have been trying to concieve now for 3 years and its getting very annoying and every appointment that I have had with the gynercologist, they have just said if you lose wait it will happen for itself. They 1st said it was down to PCOS, now they cant even confirm that!!!

Instead they just re-book my for another appointment like 4 months down the line, with the hope that i will be a size 10 when i next come to see them. I have tried to lose weight and dieted but if I dont eat proply i become weak hearted and get shaky, and as my mother is diabetic, she checked my blood and it was at 3.4 which is very low. this is being looked at, but evan if they dont give me any medication, they dont give me any support either, they just brush you under the carpet!!!

sorry if iv gone on but just wanted to ask if you can share any tips / advise / info , anything that may help me to ovulate and concieve.

I know i am only 21 but i am also married and have a home and can afford to look after my baby, its not as if tho im on the run with my druggie boyfriend or in a hostel!!!

please help,

thanks,

Aysha x

I am tracey this is my story

I weighed 18 stone 3 pound and lost weight to 16.stone and In all that time during both weight's I never had a problem with ovulation or my periods.cd25-28 I used tempertures and opk tests and I ovulate every month around day 13-14. My normal doctor says its unlkely that it is my size causing my 7 years infertility (partner is fine)ad my hormone tests are all fine cluding fsh and LH.
I do not beleive that size is a issue of your ovulating regulating and I feel angry and bitter that the NHS is not willing to help me any further with with an Lap and dye or any other tests due to my size.

Had a dye and scan and y tubes are clear ad overies are fine looking ...
we got turned down for fosterig se to no experience with Chldren we do hope to Adopt once we move form our present home.